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Am I Wasting My Time and My Heart?

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A beautiful woman looking pensive holds a clock wondering if she is wasting her time with her boyfriend.
Will he ever learn what it takes to be in a relationship?

This week's letter comes from beautiful Corinne, who tells her story of an on-again-off-again relationship with a man who can't seem to commit.

Here's her email:

My boyfriend and I were together for almost 3 years. We had a beautiful, fun relationship with so much love. The only thing that bothered me was that I always felt as though he was searching for something wrong with me.

Our relationship was really strong for about two and a half years, until things in his life started to change (he was graduating from college, I had already graduated but was staying local for a job). He talked about finding jobs together and moving in together, and sounded really optimistic about it.

All of a sudden, out of nowhere, he broke up with me and really didn't have an explanation.Continue Reading

Why Losing the Emotionally Unavailable Man is Never, Ever a Loss

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A beautiful woman sits on a bench in a park by herself.
It's not the loss you think it is. Here's why.

He’s gone or you left. Does it matter?

Not deep down in your heart where it hurts. Even if you were the one who said “enough”, it wasn’t really because you wanted to. It was because you felt you had to.

He couldn’t do it.

You tried everything to make him see, to show him what a mistake he was making if he threw it all away.

But the problem was, he couldn’t. He didn’t have it in him in the end. He may have tried, but we can’t speak for him. What we know is that he simply wasn’t capable.

I know you're heart broken. I know you're feeling down. But let me show you a different perspective here. One that took me years to figure out, and one I wished I’d had when I needed it most.Continue Reading

Everything Was Perfect, But Now He Just Wants to be Friends

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Happy young man and woman driving along country road in convertable at sunset. freedom adevnture roadtrip!
He broke things off, but now he wants to be best friends!

One of our gorgeous readers, Angela, has found herself stuck in the friend zone after the guy she was dating decided he wasn't ready for a relationship after all. The problem is, he wants to be close friends, but she still has strong feelings for him - she doesn't know what to do!

Here's what she wrote:

Hi Jane,

I was seeing someone for about a month. Everything was perfect until he dropped a bomb on me saying that he thought he was ready for a relationship, but he is not.

He says a relationship is not in his mind set, he just want to take time and find himself and figure out what he wants. He says he's not seeing anyone and not interested in dating anyone. He just wants to take care of himself.

But here's the thing, he wants us to be friends, more like best buddies. He keeps in touch everyday, we chat everyday. He checks on me if I don’t respond to his chats, he comes to my house just to say "Hi".Continue Reading

I Feel Like I'm Always Initiating Contact

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A beautiful woman lies in bed looking at her cell phone, wondering why he disappeared and won't answer her texts.
I miss him but I feel like I should wait for him to contact me.

One of our beautiful readers, who I'll call Sarah, is feeling like she's on the wrong side of a one-sided long distance relationship.

Here's her story:

My boyfriend and I have been dating just coming up on 6 months. He is nothing like anyone I've ever dated before and that's what I found most appealing.

Now he just moved to the Middle East for a new job, and I'm here in the U.S. and our communication isn't as I hoped anymore.

Full disclosure I told him I loved him before he left..and I knew beforehand so it wasn't just because he was leaving. When I agreed to tell him I was fully prepared for him not to return the sentiment so when he said thank you, I was kind of okay with it.Continue Reading

I'm So Afraid of Losing Him

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A happy couple in love embrace outside.
I love him so much that I'm so afraid of losing him!

This week the letter comes from one of our amazing anonymous readers who I've called "Heidi". She writes in to talk about her insecurities with the man she loves. Sound familiar? We all have them, in one way or another.

Here's what she had to say:

Hi Jane.

I'm 23 years old and I've been in a relationship with my current boyfriend for almost three years now and it's been going really great. He's an amazing guy and has never done anything to betray me, etc.

My problem, though, is my insecurity about this relationship. I know I love him and he loves me back but what if he finds someone prettier or smarter than me?

He's friends with loads of girls, not close to them but he knows them well. What if he starts liking one of them more than he likes me? He's known me for 5 years and I admit it can get boring at times.

Someone else could be more interesting and exciting for him than his girlfriend of almost 3 years now.Continue Reading

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