It has to get worse before it gets better. I've always felt this, about everything.
We don't do anything different - until we're forced to. We don't change anything that needs to be changed - unless we have to change, even if it's just to maintain the status quo. We can't even see that anything needs to change until we're forced to see what it was so much easier NOT to see.
Until we can't pretend anymore. Until we can't just look away and pretend we don't see it.
I'm reminded of the time my best friend bought a plane ticket she couldn't afford, left her young kids with her husband, to fly clear across the country to try to convince me to see what she could see that I couldn't at the time.
She begged me to leave him, to come back with her, to see what I wasn't seeing, to believe her when she was telling me I was losing myself in him and settling for crumbs. It was breaking her heart to see me this way, and yet still, it didn't move me.
I told her she didn't know what she was talking about. That I was only telling her the awful things when it was bad but most of the rest of the time it was good, that she just wasn't hearing from me then.
She left without convincing me.