If you’re anything like me, you know what it’s like to always be looking for that elusive secret. Trying to figure out what you’re missing to finally get it right. To finally find and be found by the guy that would be the right one for you. Or at least the guy who would be the right guy to enjoy a real relationship with. Because like I was, you’re so tired of finding yourself in dead-end relationships over and over again. It took me a long time, too, to finally attract the right kind of guy into my life. No matter how many books I’d read or advice columns I’d found.
In looking back, I realize that what was eluding me was simpler than anything I was making it out to be. The secret was me! I had everything I needed to make the change in myself if I could just see myself for what I really was. For who I really was. But that meant a shift in consciousness for me. Because up until that point, I thought it was all about me trying to be everything that a guy wanted me to be. I didn’t realize that I was everything I needed to be just by being myself. Because I didn’t know myself well enough in the first place to have any sense of confidence about myself.
How can you have confidence when you don’t know what you’re confident about in the first place? So in my usual slow-to-get-it method (that I’m going to save you from having to go through!), the light finally dawned on me; it was all about me! If I was going to attract something different in my life, a different kind of guy who would finally be able to give me what I needed, I needed to first look at myself. And once I figured out that I was worthy of a guy who treated me like he actually cherished me, it changed what I put out there. I was able to exude the type of genuine self-confidence and high self-esteem that can only come when we finally get that we really are worthy of love. The real kind. With a real guy.
Do you get what I’m saying here? There is no secret strategy, no magic formula, or special prescription. It’s all there – inside you! Because when you exude that kind of confidence, when you truly feel that way about yourself, when you can silence that voice that wants to say “who do you think you are?” with a “I know exactly who I am and what I deserve!”- that’s what I’m talking about here! When you finally believe it for yourself, the universe and all that is around you, including that guy who’s been waiting patiently for you to come around – they all rise up to see your light and confirm you, too! Because that’s when everything starts to change. When you finally believe in yourself.
So how do you go from where you’re at now to this new way of seeing yourself? It doesn’t happen overnight. But it will happen. To you, too. It starts with taking an assessment of everything you like about yourself, and everything you don’t. And looking at yourself with compassion and love. You are exactly who you are meant to be – flaws and all. What you don’t like about yourself, work to change, and what you do like about yourself, cherish. Cherish you. With all your imperfections. Because none of us are perfect, nor are we meant to be. And neither will your guy be perfect. And in the process of becoming all that you were made for, keep reminding yourself that you are beautiful just the way you are. We all have things we’re working on. We all have our rough edges along with our smooth ones. The point is to recognize that you have everything in you already and you don’t have to do anything to try to get someone to love you. A work in progress is just as deserving of love as a finished masterpiece. My wish for you is simply to know that you are enough just as you are. Because when you believe in yourself with a confidence like that, there’s no telling what life and love has in store for you!
P.S. If you’re feeling so far from seeing yourself in this kind of light right now, come back tomorrow to find out more about how you get to the place we’re talking about here. Because it truly begins with you!