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Embracing Your Softness

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A beautiful woman is in a field blowing on a dandelion while she embraces her softness
Release the soft, beautiful side of you.

I've noticed a trend recently, one that really got my attention.

Lately it seems like so much of the advice and anecdotes I've been seeing and hearing from friends, on social media, on other blogs, is about how we women can be more "badass", tougher, stronger, harder, etc.

I see so little about what we actually want – and need! – to hear.

The part about who we were made to be. That part that speaks to our soft hearts as strength, not of weakness. The part that embraces who we are in that softness, instead of reinforcing our culture's preoccupation with seeing weaknesses as strengths and strengths as weakness.

We've fallen for it, too.Continue Reading

It Was Going So Well, Then He Suddenly Became Emotionally Unavailable

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A beautiful woman looks at her phone wondering why her boyfriend suddenly became emotionally unavailable and stopped calling or texting.
He suddenly stopped calling or texting.

One of our beautiful readers, Mimi, was in a relationship for over a year with a man who is suddenly getting emotionally distant and emotionally (as well as physically) unavailable.

Here's her story:

Thanks for the opportunity to reach out. I'll be as brief as possible, sacrificing good grammar and punctuation along the way!

I reconnected with a friend of a friend, whom I first met over 20 years ago, a little under two years ago. We first Facebook messaged, getting to know one another.

I am never married, he is divorced with two kids, and we discussed our schooling, work, private lives etc. over messages for about a month. Went from Facebook to using personal emails, he gave me his phone number but I didn't call, just emailed.

Gave him mine finally and he called and we continued with phone conversations and texts. All told we got to know one another quite well through these methods for about 5 months before a face to face meeting. Which was great as it left the physical aspect out of the attraction and it was in very different levels. He lives about 3.5 hrs from me, drove down that first night for dinner, then returned home.

Seeing one another after months of contact was nothing short of wonderful.

That was August 2013, but since he has was in the process of building his own business that is seasonal, he works 7 days a week, so our contact continued to be from afar. He came again in October and soon thereafter said he wanted me to visit him and meet his kids. I did, in November 2013, and from there we saw one another regularly every few weeks.

Though his business was 'out Of season' he still worked at it night and day (he had come from a corporate setting and is very determined and driven and a workaholic to some extent). All seems great, though he is continually overwhelmed and stressed with his business and focuses on it endlessly.

Summer of 2014 fun, early Fall good as we make plans to do things and go places and he excitedly looks forward to the end of his season.Continue Reading

How To Get Over a Broken Heart

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A beautiful woman is looking very sad as she is wondering how to get over a breakup.
How do I get past this overwhelming sadness?

In my coaching practice, the question of how to get over a broken heart is one that I hear so often. Unfortunately, it’s a question almost all of us have asked at one time or another of anyone who was willing to listen.

Breakups are not only hard, they can frequently feel like something inside of us had died, and the loss of a relationship can often be just as painful as actually losing a loved one. And it makes sense – this person that you were so intimately involved with, that was such an intertwined part of your life, is suddenly gone, unreachable, untouchable.

Then there’s the self-blame, the resentment, the anger. Even if the breakup was amicable, and you've decided to remain friends (which I generally don’t recommend), it’s impossible to completely erase that feeling of utter loss.

And it really is a loss – a loss of the future that you had pictured with him. A loss of the future family life that you may have imagined. A loss of all of those wonderful times that you so totally believed were coming soon.

I know. I’ve been there too. Too many times to want to remember.

So how do we move on from a devastating breakup? How do we finally repair our shattered hopes, shattered dreams, shattered heart?Continue Reading

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