If you are anything like I was back when I was single, you know exactly what your type is. You can spot him as soon as he walks in the room. He's got that certain look, that air of confidence, that vibe that calls you out like no one else in the room. And when the two of you finally talk, finally connect, it all becomes that much more obvious to you: This is it! He's the one! This is your guy! Usually sooner, rather than later. And then you're off, once again.

It starts off amazing, like nothing you've ever experienced before. He says all the things you've been waiting to hear, he does everything that you've been dreaming of, and you find yourself unable to do much of anything else except think of him. It doesn't matter that you barely know him or that you just met; those first blissful days and weeks have you convinced he's different from all the rest.

Except that it hasn't worked out quite the way it seemed. In spite of all its potential – all his potential – here you are once again. Alone and heartbroken wondering what's wrong with you. It was the same story, the same guy, just a different face and name. And even though you told yourself it was going to be different this time, it wasn't.

I have good news for you: It wasn't you. There isn't anything wrong with you. The problem is with who you're choosing, who you're attracted to and why you're attracted to him. Because the reality is this type you're so attracted to isn't working out for more than one reason.

These men you're attracting may seem like your type, but the reality is, they're not. You deserve so much more than the surface relationship they're offering you, based on all the bells and whistles but nothing of the substance that makes up a real relationship. You may think this is what you want, that he's the type who can give you what you're looking for if only he was ready for a commitment or on the same page as you, but the reality is, he's not there and he's not going to get there anytime soon, if ever.

You see, the real you isn't willing to settle for this one type that never works out. The real you knows that there is so much more to love and being in a relationship with someone than this! He isn't looking for the same things you are. This type wants so much less than you know in your heart you're worth! He may want the surface relationship without a commitment, but that isn't who you really are!

This type of guy you're so attracted to isn't real. He's based on a fantasy you have of what a relationship should be like and what happily-ever-after looks like from the fairytales, the movies and TV shows and romance novels we've been led to believe are real. But they're not. A real, committed relationship requires two real people who know the difference between fantasy and reality and aren't afraid to find out if this might be the relationship you've both been looking for!

Deep down inside, you know all this. Every time your type hasn't worked out, and you ask yourself what is wrong with you, your true self knows that this isn't about there being anything wrong with you; but about two people on two different pages who want different things. You can't make someone love you; you can't make someone change. What you can do is get to know yourself, the real you. And take a pass on the type that isn't working. Over time, you'll find yourself less attracted to this type that had such a hold on you before, and you'll learn that it's only when you're with someone real, who's on the same page as you, in a relationship based on the reality of what is, not what you know it could be if only he were different, that you'll get to that turning point where you'll find that relationship your heart has been longing for.

That, my beautiful friend is everything you deserve!