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I Want to Let Go But He Still Has My Heart

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Woman one the beach reflecting on letting go.
I'm so confused about whether I should do something or not.

One of our gorgeous readers, Heather, is having a hard time letting go of a relationship that she knows is not what she wants.

Here's her letter:

Hi Jane!

I've been following you for a little while. I find your explanations and responses very comforting...so thank you!

I'm going to try to summarize this as best I can.

I met a man almost 3 years ago who changed my world. We were together for almost 2 years with a brief break in the middle. Our issue then and what ended up breaking us up was the issue of having kids.

He's 10 years older than me. He has 3 foster kids and didn't want to have anymore. I wasn't ready to give up on the idea of having kids so we split.

We didn't talk for a little while after the break up but then ended up staying in contact until about a month ago.Continue Reading

How Do I Let Go and Find Happiness?

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A heartbroken woman with her head in her hands, wondering how do I let go?
I can't seem to let him go and let myself be free.

This week, I've chosen a letter from one of our beautiful readers, Elizabeth. She's suffered a huge heartbreak and she's wondering how she can let go, move on, and finally find happiness in her life.

Here's her email:

I've been reading your blogs for a few years now.

I know you have answered questions and given advice about letting go, freeing yourself from your past, etc. I feel like I have a unique situation though and I am really at a loss for how to truly put it in my past.

I dated the same guy off and on from 2007-2016. Our break-ups were always very bitter and sad, and I would spend months trying to heal and forgive him and myself. Every time, once I got to the point of finally accepting everything with him, he would pop back into my life.

He would tell me how he loves me, how sorry he is for everything, and would want to give us another try. He knew I never fell out of love with him.

The break-up before the most recent one, I wrote him a letter telling him why I think our relationship didn't work and I was ready to accept that we will never be together, but I needed some closure so I wrote the letter.Continue Reading

There's A Reason For The Pain

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Image of a broken heart as s art grunge glass heart shattering.
There's a reason it hurts as bad as it does.

There’s something I have to say. You need to know this. Now.

Because when you’re in it, you’re not going to see this part. You can’t when your heart is breaking.

When you’re hurting, when you’re grasping at anything and everything to try and keep him from pulling even further away, this part will be the hardest to hear.

There IS a reason.

There’s a reason it hurts. There’s a reason for the pain.Continue Reading

Why Did He Disappear On Me?

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Angry woman stood up on a date in a coffee shop looking at her phone
On that day, I got ready, I  was happy, and sat there waiting.

Our letter this week comes from our gorgeous friend, Jade, as she tells us the story of her rocky relationship with a disappearing guy.

Her letter:

Before I ask my question, I want to give you a background story.

I've been with this guy for almost 3 years now. We've had ups and down the first year, but that's normal. But then came the twist.

Around January 2015 he left to boot camp, everything seemed okay after 3 months of not hearing from him, but then around August of last year, he left to North Carolina for school (Military) and he changed.

He stopped calling me and texting me, I caught him flirting with women on social media, he deleted photos of us, he would tell those women how he felt for them, (ex: "I find you really pretty...") and so on.

He would then tell me how annoying I was and clingy, take in mind that we were in a long distant relationship.Continue Reading

Will He Come Back?

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Woman upset after her boyfriend pulled away and disappeared, wondering if he'll ever come back.
Some tiny part tells me to wait but I know I shouldn't.

Our beautiful friend, Tali, had her boyfriend of 4 months suddenly pull away and then disappear and she's wondering if he'll ever come back.

Here's her email:

Dear Jane,

Thank you I just read your reply to Elise's email and it helped me as your emails always help me when I'm going through these constant painful patterns.

The guy I had been seeing for 4 months, who was calling me every day, sometimes even talking on the phone for hours and we were going on dates...messaged me and told me he needs time and he will find a way to get our connection back.

I was very upset and wrote back to his message including questions and he never wrote back.Continue Reading

Why Do I Keep Getting Dumped?

20 Comments

A beautiful woman is upset because she keeps getting dumped.
Why do men treat me like a testing station?

Oh, the pain of getting dumped!

Just about all of us have been there before, some of us quite often. Our beautiful friend Tony has just gone through this (again), and is wondering why she keeps getting dumped for other women.

Here's what she wrote:

Wow, I honestly never pictured myself writing to you especially after I got my boyfriend, who is now my ex as of yesterday.

So here it goes...

I don't know how to explain how I feel. I am caught between two emotions: hurt and relief.Continue Reading

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