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How Much Time to Allow Before Commitment?

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A beautiful woman is sitting on a beach looking at the ocean, wondering when he'll commit.
How long is reasonable for him to change his mind?

Our gorgeous friend, who has called herself "Undecided" is in a relationship with a man who doesn't want a commitment.

Here's her email:

I have known my male friend for 5 years. We were both separately married but 18 months ago my friend separated from his wife of 12 years and 6 months ago my husband passed away.

We have since then been good friends not just acquaintances.

He is a very understanding warm lovely person. We both have a disability child and both are very similar. So we understand each other.

My friend has been through two marriage breakups and I can understand why he doesn't want to commit as he doesn't want to get hurt again. I'm still getting over my late husband so I can't commit but some day I would like to have that commitment but I have to look after my children first.

I'm giving myself 5 years to get over my bereavement. I'm hoping this will be enough time for him to change his mind.

What do you think?Continue Reading

The One Question Only You Can Answer

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A beautiful woman sits on a couch away from her boyfriend, wondering if she can live with this.
At some point, you have to ask yourself this one question.

It happened to me.

And it happens to every one of us every time we're not honest with the one person who always gets her way in the end; our true selves.

We can't live a lie.

We can't pretend we can do this if we can't. We can't go along with someone else's terms if they're in conflict with our own. We simply can't do this because something deep down inside us won't let us.Continue Reading

I Absolutely Need a Man to Make Me Happy, and I Feel POWERLESS

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A beautiful woman sits on a couch at home alone, feeling sad that she doesn't have a boyfriend.
I'm secretly so lonely and depressed when I'm not with a man.

One of our magnificent readers Liz, is feeling utterly powerless...

Here's her story:

Hi Jane! First of all, I LOVE your site. Thanks for always being honest, helpful, and down to earth.

Given that, I'm hoping you can help me here.

I want SO badly to be that happy, independent, empowered single woman. I should be happy - I have my dream career, a social life, close friends and family, and my own hobbies.Continue Reading

Why Standing On The Sidelines, Waiting For Things to Change, Never Gets You There

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A beautiful woman sits on a bench in a park by herself.
It's time to try something different.

What does it feel like to not have to be perfect?

Or to not care about what anyone else thinks?

Or to be the woman every man wants?

Or to finally be able to let go of him?

What is it like to live like that? To not feel like there's something wrong with you, to live your life like that confident, sassy woman you know, to say "next" when he's not ready for the commitment you are? What would it be like to live your own life like this?Continue Reading

He Says "They're Just Friends"

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A guy is holding hands with one woman, while checking out and flirting with another woman
I found out from social media that he's dating other women.

One of our gorgeous readers, who has called herself "A", has been dating a guy for a while, and now thinks he's dating other women. He says these other women are just friends, but she's not sure what to do next.

Here's her email:

Hi Jane! I am so glad I have found you.

I find this website very helpful and I think for most of us, its a relief, because from my experience I get really confused and that inner voice inside of me telling me "I don't think this is going to end well".

Well here is my question: from a guy's point of view what's the idea of dating?

Because I have been dating a really nice guy for a month now, he is 3 years older than me (I am 22), although age doesn't really matter and for once I thought, wow I think this is the one. This guy seems just right, with the way he treats you, takes you out, worries about you, talks to you everyday, I feel great every time I am with him and I think it's the same feeling from his part, anyway its the whole fairy tale.

Everything it's perfect.

Suddenly just out of the blue, I noticed on the social network that he is also dating other girls. Continue Reading

The One Thing That Changes Everything

43 Comments

A beautiful, exuberant woman is in a field with her arms raised towards the sun.
Do this for yourself.

You want him to feel what you feel.

You want so badly for him to feel what you’re going through. You want him to feel the pain of your broken heart.

How could he do this to you? How could he be OK that he did what he did to you? You don’t see the role you played. You can’t. You can only look to him. After all, he did this to you, whatever this may happen to be.

He led you on. He promised so much. Until it all fell apart. Until he let you down.Continue Reading

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