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Don't Do This to Yourself

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A woman rubs her head because she's confused wondering if he's into her or not.
You deserve so much more than this!

You've waited.

You've given him space.

You've waited some more.

You've initiated contact with him when you could wait no longer to understand what is going on. And yet he treats you like it's nothing.

Like you are nothing to him.

He agrees to talk, but can't even confirm this and leaves you hanging.

Let him go. Let it be.

You deserve so much more than this. So much more than him. Yes, he looked at you like that; yes, he gave you all those signs that seemed to say he was in it, too. But for whatever reason, he's not there.

Maybe it's his busy job, maybe it's his past, maybe it's a million other things that you could drive yourself crazy over trying to figure him out.

Don't do this to yourself.Continue Reading

Do You Remember What It’s Like to Dream a Dream?

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Beautiful young woman with long hair lying on the grass
Come dream with me, Beautiful!

I haven’t been able to let go of a coaching session I had last week.

I saw her so clearly.

Like an old soul, a deeply feeling soul. A beautiful soul that touches the earth and feels everything it encounters.

Her obstacles were practical, logical, tangible, and undeniably so.

I couldn’t put a finger on it … yet. Until she revealed to me that this way I saw her so very clearly, the description I provided her with what I was seeing when I looked at her, when I heard her, when I truly listened, was all news to her.Continue Reading

Why Taking the Pressure Off Is Your Fastest Route to Love!

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Ballroom dance floor abstract, digital painting in red, purple, white, blue, tan.
It's tiime to set yourself free!

There’s a song I used to love belting out the lyrics to – never mind that it was sung by a sensitive, soft-spoken man with a perm who could have been old enough to be my dad.

When I heard the words and looked up the lyrics to make sure I had them right, they resonated with me in a way that nothing had before.

It didn’t matter that I was only in my twenties myself. It didn’t matter that I was probably the last person he imagined identifying with them and he certainly hadn’t written them for someone like me.

What mattered was that in my twenties I felt old.

I had always been an old soul. I knew more and felt more and understood more than most anyone my age, and almost all of my friends and boyfriends had always been much older than me. So when first heard the song, I understood from my old soul standpoint just like everyone who it was actually intended for would.Continue Reading

Taking Off the Mask

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Beautiful woman with a carnival mask.
Sometimes we don't even realize we're wearing a mask.

You’ve been told so many things.

You’ve been told who to be. You’ve been told what to say. And you’ve been told that it all matters IF you want to find love.

You’ve been told so many stories so that you’d see why someone else knows so much more than you do. You’ve been told to trust, to have faith, to listen to what someone else knows.

After all, you’re single, right? Or worse, you’re in love with an emotionally unavailable man who can’t seem to commit. Or maybe you’re involved with a married man who can’t seem to give you anything more than empty promises.

But whatever your situation, there’s one thing you’ve got in common with everyone else who’ve been told all these things; you’re scared. Underneath the hurt, the anger, the frustration, the pain, you’re afraid it’s never going to happen again.

You’re afraid it’s never going to change.Continue Reading

Give This Up Instead

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A beautiful woman is frustrated with her head in her hands.
It's taken its toll.

Wow.

I heard you. Loud and clear.

While my last post was intended to remind you of all that you are and all that you have to offer someone worthy of you – instead of comparing yourself to anyone else, I wasn’t prepared for the kind of response it invoked in many of you.

How you’re so long past comparing yourself that you’ve skipped right to the totally given up on… you.

On love. On any him.

Your words brought me back to that long lonely night. The dark night of the soul is how nights like that have been referred to. And that's exactly what it feels like. Those times where everything seems dark, where nothing seems like it’s ever going to change, where God, or the Universe, or whatever you happen to believe in seem to have turned their back on you.Continue Reading

Why it ends. And why it has to.

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For every ending there's a new beginning concept showing a stormy ending followed by a sunny blue sky beginning.
It ends because you need it to end.

I see you.

Over there, sitting all alone with your head in your hands.

Oh you think no one notices you, but I do.

How could I not? Not where I've been.

Because when you've been there, you're the first one to feel it when you see all the signs. Broken heart, broken dreams, broken everything, or so it feels. How can it not feel like this when you feel everything as deeply as you do?

Why?

Why did it end? What did I do that was so wrong? What did I do to deserve this?

You want to know. You weren't ready. Not like this, not the way it ended and not the way you feel now.

If you can just find some reason for it – if you can just make some sense of it - you know you'll be all right.Continue Reading

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