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My Boyfriend is Still Friends With His Exes

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A group of male and female friends are out together socially at a restaurant.
He started calling her a friend rather than an ex.

Gorgeous Sherrie writes about her long-distance boyfriend who likes to bring up his "accomplished" exes (who he still maintains friendships with) in conversation. She's wondering if her feelings about this are normal or if she's overreacting.

Here's her story:

Hi Jane,

My question is about my boyfriend's two ex-girlfriends.

My boyfriend is a wonderful man. We have been in a long-distance relationship (USA and Australia) for two and a half years. We FaceTime each week and SMS or text other days. We spent three months living together a year ago when I was working on a project in the US.

We see each other every 6 months. He is coming to spend Christmas and New Years with me this year.Continue Reading

Everything Was Perfect, But Now He Just Wants to be Friends

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Happy young man and woman driving along country road in convertable at sunset. freedom adevnture roadtrip!
He broke things off, but now he wants to be best friends!

One of our gorgeous readers, Angela, has found herself stuck in the friend zone after the guy she was dating decided he wasn't ready for a relationship after all. The problem is, he wants to be close friends, but she still has strong feelings for him - she doesn't know what to do!

Here's what she wrote:

Hi Jane,

I was seeing someone for about a month. Everything was perfect until he dropped a bomb on me saying that he thought he was ready for a relationship, but he is not.

He says a relationship is not in his mind set, he just want to take time and find himself and figure out what he wants. He says he's not seeing anyone and not interested in dating anyone. He just wants to take care of himself.

But here's the thing, he wants us to be friends, more like best buddies. He keeps in touch everyday, we chat everyday. He checks on me if I don’t respond to his chats, he comes to my house just to say "Hi".Continue Reading

How Do I Avoid Falling Into the Friend Zone?

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A beautiful woman walks in the city with a guy that is keeping her in the friend zone.
I want a real relationship with a guy who wants one, too!

One of our beautiful readers, Audrey, has lots of guys that seem to show interest in her, but many of them seem to just want to be friends.

Here's her email:

Hi Jane,

I am so thankful I have discovered your website. I feel more valuable just after reading a few of your posts and watching your first video.

I would LOVE your advice on how to stay out of the "friend zone."

Of course there are a ton of articles and posts out there, but I would love your advice in particular.

What should a girl do when a guy is showing interest in her via one-on-one time together and lots of texting, but is keeping her in the friend zone so that he can enjoy her companionship with "no strings attached"?Continue Reading

It Feels Like a Relationship, But He Says He Just Wants to be Friends

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A beautiful woman leans in close to a man who is sending her mixed signals.
Why is he sending me these mixed signals?

One of our beautiful readers from all the way over in Northern Europe is heart broken over a guy she fell hard for, who was acting like he's in a relationship with her, but then said he only wants to be friends.

Here's her story:

Hey Jane!

I am a young woman from Sweden that needs your advice. I have been asking loads of people for advice but it doesn't seem to match with what I am trying to tell them, in other words, the advice is not helping me anywhere.

Like most of your emails, this is about me and another person. This person is one odd guy that I've known for quite some time now (almost A year).

I met him right after when I broke up with my boyfriend that I was supposed to get engaged to, but we went through some issues and went separate ways. Right after that, probably one week afterwards, I met this wonderful, innocent and caring guy over social media.Continue Reading

Will He Ever Want a Committed Relationship With Me?

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Friend Zone word cloud.
How can I get out of the Friend Zone?

One of our beautiful readers, who has called herself "Sleepless in Seattle", is wondering if the guy she's interested in will ever want a committed relationship with her, or if he just wants to be friends.

Here's her email:

Dear Jane,

I need help with this guy.

We met each other about three months ago in a play that we were both a part of, and I liked him immediately. After a couple months of being just casual acquaintances, we began messaging over Facebook.  After we began messaging, we messaged practically every night for hours for about two weeks.

He even said twice in a joking way, "Why don't we just get married already?"

Then, we hung out together with a mutual friend at the movies. Then we finally hung out alone and I felt serious chemistry between us. He was always hugging me, staring at me, touching my hands, smiling.

Then, I told him that I had feelings for him.Continue Reading

How Do I Get Out of the Friend Zone?

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A beautiful woman is standing next to a tree in a park smiling at her male friend, wondering how to get out of the friend zone.One of our beautiful readers, Elizabeth, is wondering how to get out of the friend zone with a guy who, by all standard definitions, seems to be interested in her, but is telling her that he's not attracted to her.

Here's her email:

I've read most of your emails and find them very inspiring. I have a unique situation of friend vs lover.

I've had a crush on a 29 year old male, I am 30.

We have traveled together to Japan and plan to do so in the future to Switzerland, Utah and possibly China.

He's what I call a shy nerd, had only one girlfriend in his whole life and only for 3 months. I never had one myself aside from online boyfriends and dates from online dating sites.

He's smart, goofy, sincere and handsome.

He and I clicked playing baseball and talking about nuclear fusion. We attend lectures together that inspires the future. We have spoke about advances of the world and books we love to read. Our parents get along, and we feel comfortable together. He would drive an hour just to see me almost every weekend and if I don't talk to him for more than a week he'd be 'concern' and call and text til I reach him.

I expressed my feelings for him and he declined it, more than once. Sating he was unattracted to me.

Usual response?

Ignore him and continue life. But he won't let me!

He'd text and insist why am I ignoring him? If I am upset with him, or if I state "I am busy" he'd prod as to "what have you been doing?"Continue Reading

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