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Another Chance

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Fresh start ahead road sign concept for new year symbolizing making positive changes.
It's time for a fresh start.

Every New Year we’re given another chance.

To do something different. To clean the slate. To start fresh. To begin again.

And every year we resolve to do exactly this. To do things differently, to turn over a new leaf and do everything we didn’t do before.

We’re so full of good intentions, so full of hope. We’re determined to make this year “our year”.

Except that it rarely turns out this way.

Sure, we make small strides and little steps along the way, but it seldom (if ever) turns out the way we expected it to when we compare notes at the end of the year.Continue Reading

What I Want You To Remember This Holiday Season

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Beautiful woman outdoors in frosty winter park with snowflakes.
If you only remember one thing, make it this.

There's a reason I’m here, doing what I do.

To remind you of what you can’t see from where you are now. To remind you of your power. To remind you of your beauty.

To remind you that the only reason you can’t see what I can see is because you haven’t come to the part yet where you prove yourself wrong.

Because without proof, you can’t believe it. Without proof, it’s the hardest thing to believe what you can’t yet see.

So my message to you today as we go about celebrating the holidays in whatever way you celebrate, is to stop believing what you’ve been believing about yourself every time another holiday season comes around.Continue Reading

Letting Go of Yesterday

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A woman holding a dandelion in her hand blowing it away making a wish, signifying letting go.
This is how you let it go.

Keep going. Keep moving. Keep walking. Don’t look back.

You’re going to be okay.

You’re going to get through this.

You’ve got this!

Whatever our mantra happens to be, they all say the same thing.

Let go. Leave it in the past. Don’t keep holding on so tightly to what you should have said or done.

But the problem is that for all our well-intentioned words of inspiration and support, nothing cuts to the heart of how we actually feel.

As in trapped.Continue Reading

Taking Off the Mask

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Beautiful woman with a carnival mask.
Sometimes we don't even realize we're wearing a mask.

You’ve been told so many things.

You’ve been told who to be. You’ve been told what to say. And you’ve been told that it all matters IF you want to find love.

You’ve been told so many stories so that you’d see why someone else knows so much more than you do. You’ve been told to trust, to have faith, to listen to what someone else knows.

After all, you’re single, right? Or worse, you’re in love with an emotionally unavailable man who can’t seem to commit. Or maybe you’re involved with a married man who can’t seem to give you anything more than empty promises.

But whatever your situation, there’s one thing you’ve got in common with everyone else who’ve been told all these things; you’re scared. Underneath the hurt, the anger, the frustration, the pain, you’re afraid it’s never going to happen again.

You’re afraid it’s never going to change.Continue Reading

Moving Forward in a Long Distance Relationship

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Illustration of the earth depicting a long distance relationshp with two lovers across the globe.
Or should I just cut contact and move on?

Beautiful Stella writes to tell us about her burgeoning long distance relationship, and she's wondering if there's anything she can do to move things forward.

Here's her question:

Hi Jane,

I love reading all the wonderful and insightful advise you give to women (and men) about love and relationships.

Recently I was on vacation in Europe and met this amazing guy with whom I had an instant connection. After a great week I came back home but we have been talking on the phone every day. Our conversations last anywhere between 1-3 hours.

He asked me to come back to visit and I agreed so there's a possibility of seeing him again but beyond that I'm not sure what we can do to advance our "relationship".Continue Reading

Is It Me?

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Beautiful brunette woman thinking, tired, wondering if she's the one with commitment issues.
Am I the one with commitment issues?

It's a question I've gotten from so many of my coaching clients, I've decided to address it here on the blog.

If all of the men you date have a problem with commitment, does that mean it's actually YOU who has a problem with commitment?

There’s a difference here that I want to point out. You’re here and he’s not. That’s a significant difference because it reveals one very important thing; you’re at least open to having this conversation, however difficult it may be.

Why is that such an important distinction? Because it forms the basis of all our growth in every single one of our relationships!Continue Reading

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