Finding your YOU that leads to TWO
She was the woman everyone noticed as she walked into the room.
"I love your dress", said one of the women at our table. "Something seems different about you", said another.
I couldn't have agreed more.
I vaguely recognized her from somewhere, but it took me a while to remember where I knew her from.
Then I remembered. I had met her a month or so before at a mutual friend's party when she had overheard me talking with another woman about what I do.Continue Reading
One of our beautiful readers, Felicia, is wondering if she drove away a great guy by being (her words) a "hot mess".
Hi Jane.
I recently discovered your site to look for answers to many of my questions.
I have seen many articles or posts everywhere that he was not just the one or bad boy, etc.
But...what if, in fact, we were the one messing with a great guy? Or "Like attracts like"?
I recently ended up with a person who was quite close to whom I am looking for while my mother was fighting for her life. I met him via online dating site after several months after relocating to new country. Prior to that, I was just enjoying casual datings with some men. However he was different.Continue Reading
It doesn't matter who he is.
It doesn't matter how much you made him into in your mind.
There's only one question that matters … are you going to let someone incapable of loving you the way you deserve to be loved do this to you?
This waiting around.
This beating yourself up for what always takes two.Continue Reading
My husband and I couldn't be more opposite in so many ways. I often say that he is everything I'm not, and I'm everything he's not. But when I talk about that, I'm talking about the practical day to day type things.
His strengths are in areas that I used to view as my weaknesses.
But the truth is, as much as we are opposite each other in many ways, in the things that really matter – like values, like morals, like our parenting styles, like our communication styles – we're anything but opposite.
We may drive each other crazy sometimes (and yes, we do!) with his attention to detail and my insistence on looking at the big picture, but when it comes right down to it, it's the very things that are so different from me that I appreciate so much about him.Continue Reading
One of our dear friends, Kim, has been in a relationship with a guy that keeps on disappearing on her.
Hi Jane:
I read your article 'Why you're attracting Emotionally Unavailable Men' and it motivated me to take action with your Weekly Love Steps program.
I am well versed in working with steps as I’m in recovery through AA, and have been sober now for 19 months after spending 10 months in limbo relapsing, and trying my best to be a social drinker but thankfully am an alcoholic and believe that today.
It has been an incredible, life changing journey filled with misery and confusion at first and now an entirely new perspective on the world.Continue Reading
The rain was falling as I walked home from the bookstore the other day, a light gentle April rain that brought me back to another place and time. A time when yet another man who seemed to have so much potential hadn't been quite able to live up to that potential that only I had been able to see.
It was a time when running – and especially running in the rain, so out of character from who I used to be - became my therapy.
With each step, the pain lessened just a little bit more. I was doing something that I had never known I could do before. And with the support and encouragement of a new found friend, the hurt and the pain and the regrets of "if only", began to slowly lessen.
But there was something more.
I wanted him to be wrong. I wanted him to pay. I wanted him to suffer the way I felt he had made me suffer. I wanted her to suffer too; the woman he insisted was never more than a friend, the same woman who had called herself my friend, who thought nothing of finding every opportunity she could to flirt with him.
I wanted them both to pay.Continue Reading
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