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Forbidden Love

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Silhouette of a woman and a man about to kiss, symbolizing love.
I'm making the decision each and every time to see him.

This week, beautiful Maree writes to tell her story of "forbidden love".

Here's what she wrote:

Hi Jane,

I am in a very wierd situation at the moment and the pull is too strong for me to see reality.

I have met an amazing young man 19 years younger...I am 44 he is 25.

I have never felt so at ease so myself so comfortable and connected as I do with him. We haven't had sex but there is a lot of fire and passion when we kiss...so even on a physical level we are deeply attracted.

So now...here is the problem...I feel so ashamed to say it...but I need to share...he is the elder brother of my daughters boyfriend...I know...it is sickly and not done. AND I SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF MYSELF!!!

My daughter means everthing to me!! And yet I am making the decision each and every time to see him...

Please wake me up and slap me out of this!!Continue Reading

Why Taking the Pressure Off Is Your Fastest Route to Love!

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Ballroom dance floor abstract, digital painting in red, purple, white, blue, tan.
It's tiime to set yourself free!

There’s a song I used to love belting out the lyrics to – never mind that it was sung by a sensitive, soft-spoken man with a perm who could have been old enough to be my dad.

When I heard the words and looked up the lyrics to make sure I had them right, they resonated with me in a way that nothing had before.

It didn’t matter that I was only in my twenties myself. It didn’t matter that I was probably the last person he imagined identifying with them and he certainly hadn’t written them for someone like me.

What mattered was that in my twenties I felt old.

I had always been an old soul. I knew more and felt more and understood more than most anyone my age, and almost all of my friends and boyfriends had always been much older than me. So when first heard the song, I understood from my old soul standpoint just like everyone who it was actually intended for would.Continue Reading

Why You Need to Lean In to Let Go

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Beautiful woman walking in the field and runs hand through the high dry grass in autumn.
You don’t go down. You don't become powerless. You don’t lose your shine.

I did it again.

I put my foot in my mouth. In my excitement, my passion, my well-intentioned motive to connect more deeply, I say or do something that makes me feel awkward.

Again.

I should be getting used to this by now, but it’s still an uncomfortable place for me. So I’m learning a new way of dealing with, well, me.

If I allow myself to care so much about what other people are now going to think of me, or what they’re going to say about me, then I’ve given them all the power.

But if instead I recognize that no, this is all me - that I said what I said with all that passion behind it because this, too is the authentic real me - then I keep every bit of my power. And maybe I even gain some.

I’ve been thinking about this lately, because, well, it came up again.Continue Reading

Between Now and Then

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Words just be, written on sand of a beach.
Whoever you want to be.

I see so many of us striving so hard to become what we feel like we "should be".

Moving as fast as we can to get out of the now that we want to leave, that we’re in such a hurry to put behind us, to become who we want to be.

There’s such an important point that we miss as we go through this journey of life. This life isn’t about all those picture perfect moments that we can neatly photograph and post on Facebook for all our friends and family to see.

You’re not defined by an engagement, marriage, your career advances, the number of birthdays you've had or everything else our culture tells us we're defined by.Continue Reading

Self Blame: It’s Holding You Back

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Self Blame written on silhouette of a person's head.
Self blame: It's holding you back more than you realize.

You’ve got your list. You know what you want this year.

Love.

Someone special to share your life with. And everything else. But nothing quite compares to love.

And finding him. Finally.

Right?

Ok, so there’s something we have to settle first. Something that’s been holding you back more than you realize, more than any of us realize.Continue Reading

It's the Opposite of What We Think

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Beautiful young woman with long hair lying on the grass
What if you could look at it another way?

We look around and we see so much of what our culture calls strength among our friends, our colleagues, our role models, almost everyone it seems. They let things roll off them, they don’t take everything so personally, they walk away without looking back.

They make everything  look so much easier than the way it feels to us.

The way it feels to us.

It’s this part of us that gets the least amount of validation from the world around us and the people who are the least like us. In a world where success is evaluated by the measurable things that have nothing to do with our hearts, it’s no wonder we can feel so wrong, so misplaced, so counter to what we feel so otherwise pressured to be.Continue Reading

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