Getting to TRUE Love

Finding your YOU that leads to TWO

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Finding Love

The posts in the Finding Love category relate to bringing love into your life, whether you are currently single, dating, or in a relationship. This category includes topics such as finding yourself, knowing what you want, living your life, etc.

Our Biggest Mistake

12 Comments

A beautiful woman sits realizing she's made a huge mistake in her relationship, as her boyfriend walks away.
It's time to see the reality.

Like so many of us, I used to wonder what was so wrong with me.

My relationships all started out with such amazing potential, only to end in utter heartbreak. I couldn’t understand why it kept happening, why he always changed from what he was in the beginning.

I was convinced there must be something wrong with me!

What I eventually came to realize was that he didn’t change at all; it was that I had created an image of him that he simply couldn’t live up to.

Of course it wasn’t only him. No, the truth was that I knew nothing about being real either.Continue Reading

The Truth About Just How Ready You Have to Be

14 Comments

Love your self paper bubbles with clip hanging on the line against purple background.
Yes, love yourself - but what does that really look like?

We all know the importance of self-love. We’ve heard it so many times, we’ve got it memorized.

You have to love yourself first because someone else can love you.

But what does that really mean?

Does it mean we have to be alone until we get this right? That there’s no hope for us to attract that special someone in our life until we’ve reached a certain level of self-love and emotional, relational health?

That’s just about enough to cause us to give up completely.

Why bother when it seems like we’ll never get there? Why try when everyone else must already be there since they’re meeting him and we’re still so far behind? And while we’re at it, why hope at all when we just keep meeting the same type of men over and over and over again?

Except that this isn’t the whole story.Continue Reading

For Better or Worse

24 Comments

Jane Garapick wedding photo on the beach.
There's the perfect wedding photo. Then there's the reality.

It was our anniversary last week. We’ve been married 14 years now.

When I posted a picture of my wedding day to Facebook, I was so grateful for the wonderful responses I got from so many of you, but I felt like there was something missing.

I felt like that picture said so little and for you, for every one of you who I’ve gotten to know so well here in our Internet community, I was left feeling like there was so much more I wanted to say.

To anyone who doesn’t know me, it was just another picture of one more happy couple who met and found the kind of love we all long for. It looks perfect.

The perfect couple on their wedding day. The perfect location. The perfect everything.

And yes, that day was just about as close to perfect as a day has ever been for me.

But there’s something else I need to tell you. Another part of this you won’t usually hear; the part you can't see in the picture.Continue Reading

Why Some Women Pull It Off, But Some Can’t

11 Comments

A beautiful woman looks out over the ocean.
They make it look so easy.

Some women can do anything and they STILL get their man. They make it look so easy.

“So why can’t I?” You wonder.

The very fact that we’re looking for a list of rules to follow is the reason why.

We think if we just do this and that, or what someone says we should do, we’ll have it.

We’ll get the guy.

But the problem is that following a list of rules only gets us that list of rules. It doesn’t get us the guy!Continue Reading

They Don’t Understand

36 Comments

A woman sits alone on a swing looking at the sunset.
You simply can't imagine your life without him.

Why would you want to stay with someone who doesn't want you?

Why would you insist you're getting something out of a relationship where you're getting nothing more than crumbs?

Why would you put yourself through this?

They don't understand. They can’t understand.

Because they’re not in it. You are. And when you're in it, there's nothing else to understand.

Except that you want him.

Except that you need him.

Except that you can't imagine your life without him.

Continue Reading

Is It Too Late For Me?

20 Comments

A beautiful woman with camera looking at a man.
It's the lens we see through that colors everything.

This week our question comes from one of our beautiful readers, Sheela, who is wondering if it's too late for her and if all the good men really are taken.

Here's her email:

Hi Jane

I really love your blog and I was hoping you could answer a question.

I'm 38 years old, and I've never had any kind of a serious relationship, simply because I went through so many traumatic incidents in childhood and suffered such severe school bullying that I was afraid of getting close to men.

I've never gone past a few dates with anyone.Continue Reading

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