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Why Did He Disappear On Me?

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Angry woman stood up on a date in a coffee shop looking at her phone
On that day, I got ready, I  was happy, and sat there waiting.

Our letter this week comes from our gorgeous friend, Jade, as she tells us the story of her rocky relationship with a disappearing guy.

Her letter:

Before I ask my question, I want to give you a background story.

I've been with this guy for almost 3 years now. We've had ups and down the first year, but that's normal. But then came the twist.

Around January 2015 he left to boot camp, everything seemed okay after 3 months of not hearing from him, but then around August of last year, he left to North Carolina for school (Military) and he changed.

He stopped calling me and texting me, I caught him flirting with women on social media, he deleted photos of us, he would tell those women how he felt for them, (ex: "I find you really pretty...") and so on.

He would then tell me how annoying I was and clingy, take in mind that we were in a long distant relationship.Continue Reading

The ONE Thing A Man Who Can’t Commit NEEDS You to Do

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slender long-haired woman wearing white summer dress while walking on a green meadow towards a bright and sunny horizon.
There's only one thing you have to do.

You know this kind of man all too well.

He’s pulling away, he’s slowing down, he’s changing.

You’re here for one reason and one reason only: to find out how to get him back.

You want to turn back the clock, make him change back to everything you want him to be.

How do I change him back? How do I make him want what he said he wanted before? These are your questions. It's the answers you want with all your heart to know. But what if we didn't need to make it so complicated? What if it was right there in front of you?Continue Reading

Give This Up Instead

32 Comments

A beautiful woman is frustrated with her head in her hands.
It's taken its toll.

Wow.

I heard you. Loud and clear.

While my last post was intended to remind you of all that you are and all that you have to offer someone worthy of you – instead of comparing yourself to anyone else, I wasn’t prepared for the kind of response it invoked in many of you.

How you’re so long past comparing yourself that you’ve skipped right to the totally given up on… you.

On love. On any him.

Your words brought me back to that long lonely night. The dark night of the soul is how nights like that have been referred to. And that's exactly what it feels like. Those times where everything seems dark, where nothing seems like it’s ever going to change, where God, or the Universe, or whatever you happen to believe in seem to have turned their back on you.Continue Reading

He Won't Stay and He Won't Go

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A beautiful woman with her face in her hands wonders what to do.
I'm just not sure what to do...

One of our lovely readers, Sunflower, writes to ask if she should move in with boyfriend who says he loves her, but whose actions may tell a different story ...

Here's what she wrote:

I met this guy 12 years ago, he loves me, but he is commitment phobic.

After 5 years, I gave him an ultimatum, knowing it was the wrong thing to do. I told him since other women are calling you it seems to me that you want to have an open relationship, let's do that.

I will date other guys, too.

He said fine, but when he saw me having dinner with someone else he totally changed and got really upset. He called me everyday, wanted me back.

I refused for a month.

One day I gave up. I left a guy with great potential, and went back with him hoping he would change.Continue Reading

Why Some Women Pull It Off, But Some Can’t

11 Comments

A beautiful woman looks out over the ocean.
They make it look so easy.

Some women can do anything and they STILL get their man. They make it look so easy.

“So why can’t I?” You wonder.

The very fact that we’re looking for a list of rules to follow is the reason why.

We think if we just do this and that, or what someone says we should do, we’ll have it.

We’ll get the guy.

But the problem is that following a list of rules only gets us that list of rules. It doesn’t get us the guy!Continue Reading

Will It Ever Work Out?

31 Comments

A beautiful woman sits on a bench, looking discouraged, wondering if it will ever work out.
I don't want to be in a relationship with anyone else.

Beautiful Katie has been dating a guy who's suddenly gotten very hot and cold on her. He says he doesn't want a serious relationship, and now she's wondering if it will ever work out.

Here's Her Story:

So a while ago I started seeing this guy and things were pretty good.

I had been talking to him for a while before that and we had a lot in common. When we finally met up in person it was like I had finally found someone who understood me. He was extremely nice and polite and sweet - all qualities I never knew I wanted.

I was always reading a lot into the relationship though. I hate not knowing how other people feel about me.

We went on two dates and the second one went similarly, where we got along amazingly, better than I had with anyone else, and it felt really right. He made me extremely happy.

From the beginning I was worried that he wasn't as into me as I was in him because he didn't kiss me on the first date, but then he did on the second one. We were talking almost every day after that and would have long conversations about what we wanted in life, we have very similar wants for our futures.

On top of that we have a lot in common. A lot.

It feels like we're reading each other’s minds sometimes. I got into a bad car accident after our second date and things kinda spiraled from there. I was really depressed and needed someone to be there for me in a way that was kind of asking too much of him since we weren't that serious and I got disappointed.

He was there for me but I wanted some stupid gesture like showing up at the hospital or coming to see me to make sure I was okay. That didn't happen but things were still going pretty well and he was there for me for a lot of it.

Then he stopped texting me back.Continue Reading

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