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We Had Amazing Chemistry but I Haven't Heard From Him in 4 Days!

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Rear view of a woman holding the curtains open to look out of a large light window at home.
Should I reach out to him or not?

Our letter this week highlights one of the dilemmas so many of us have encountered before. Amazing physical chemistry and, well, some other things that aren't exactly amazing - or even acceptable.

That's the subject of today's letter, and like most of us who've been here before, it feels just a little too familiar.

Here's her story:

Hi Jane,

I’ve been dating this guy for two months. Sparks flew immediately.

I’m 32 and he’s 33. He’s a resident Pathology physician and I work at the same hospital, but in different departments.

We have amazing physical chemistry and we would text each other constantly throughout the day and evening.  He would tell me that I make him nervous and that he thinks about me all the time.Continue Reading

Did I Push It Too Far Playing Hard to Get?

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Beautiful woman sitting down checking her text messages using mobile phone.
Did I play too hard to get? I'm afraid I'll never hear from him again!

Ever wondered if you can play too hard to get - and actually lose an opportunity to get someone at all?  Well, that's Jessica's question on the blog this week.

Here's her story:

Hi Jane,

I am so confused by this guy right now.

I would like to say he is not interested but I feel like that isn't 100 percent the case.

This guy is a player and I knew this, we met at a friends BBQ and he was pursuing me for weeks asking to see me (not to take me out but inviting me over to his house).  He was messaging me every day and asking me questions like 'how is your day going' etc. so I felt like he wasn't just after one thing.

Anyway I went to his house and we watched a few movies, we got on so well and could not stop laughing. I knew he was into me. He tried to have sex with me but I said no as I do not sleep around.Continue Reading

I slept with my boss and now it's awkward

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Relationship problems concept - close up of man in shirt dressing up and adjusting tie on neck over woman in bed background.
Afterward he just brushed me aside, got changed, and handed me my things.

Our letter today comes from Claire, who's in a situation with her boss that she needs some advice on. Here it is, along with my response. Even if you've never been in this situation, read on because there's some underlying themes of power and control I think you'll relate to.

Here's her email:

Hi Jane,

I am a 21-year-old female who like many other women have nowadays got involved with their boss. I have only been in the business for 7 months and I worry I could lose my job over this.

But anyway, when I started working with him I was only 20, it started off as any natural friendly relationship would, although with the casual flirtatious joke or dirty remark at times, but I thought this was part of his personality at times.

Fast forward a few months and we started messaging on Instagram and from there it turned very flirtatious although he had stated he didn't want a relationship and I had said the same thing.Continue Reading

Do You Think He Just Used Me for Sex?

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A woman is about to kiss a man that is her romantic fantasy.
Everything seemed so perfect - did he just use me?

Our letter this week comes all the way from Hong Kong, where beautiful Laura wants to know what she should do about a guy she met 4 months ago on Tinder, who lives on the West Coast.

Here's her letter and my response:

Hi Jane,

I met this guy on Tinder 4 months ago, and after talking to each other for 1 month, he asked me out. To give you some background information, he lives in SF while I live in Hong Kong, but he works between Hong Kong and SF.

We had sex on the first date.

I know this is not good, but he said he didn't plan it and said he will see me again. So after one week working in China (we text each other every day), he came back to Hong Kong for one day and he did ask me out, said he wants to see me. Its a dinner date.Continue Reading

He Says I'm Too Emotional

15 Comments

A very tired, stressed and fed up attractive woman. wondering if she's too emotional.
He says I have to change my overly emotional ways.

Beautiful Cassidy is dating a guy who tells her she's too emotional. She's reaching out for help to figure out if she should continue to see where her relationship is going, or if she's just wasting her time.

Here's her email:

I met this guy on a dating site back in early December of 2016.

We had sex shortly after meeting for the first time and I wasn't expecting to hear from him after.

Yet... I did.

We've talked everyday since the day we met. He's told me things like he has only pictured spending his life with one other female other than me (which at the time he said this, I felt, was too soon to know that) and talks about the future regularly.

He had to go back to his temporary home in another state shortly after we met but visits his home state (where I live)  every three-four months. I've asked him if he's seeing anyone else and he's certain he's only interested in me.Continue Reading

What Should I Do? He Says He Wants to Slow Things Down

90 Comments

A woman is holding her head, exasperated, wondering why he wants to slow things down.
Things were going so well, but now he wants to slow things down!

One of our beautiful readers, who has asked to remain anonymous, is in a new relationship where the sparks were flying. After they were intimate, he has said that he wants to slow things down, and now she doesn't know what to do.

I've chosen to call her "Daisy", because she reminds me of all the beautiful spring flowers blooming right now, finding out just how beautiful – and how worthy – they truly are.

Naturally. In their own time.

Here's her email:

Hello,

I am very confused and don't know what to do.

I met someone and we hit it off right away. We talk on the phone every day, go to dinner when we get the chance (we live far from each other so don't get to go on dates as much as we would like) and have a strong connection.

After about a month he invited me over his home to spend the night. He told me he wants to be with me and that he really likes me.

We ended up sleeping together.Continue Reading

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About Jane Garapick

Hi, I'm Jane Garapick. I'm here to provide inspiration, support and empowerment on the journey to true love. I know what it’s like to have a broken heart, a broken dream, and a broken you. And I know for a fact, that your dreams can still come true! Read more...
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