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Relationships

The Relationships category contains posts regarding the stage after dating, in which you are generally in an exclusive monogamous relationship. The Relationships category includes posts on such topics as meeting the family, commitment, is he the right one for you?, etc.

No commitment? Here's the One Thing You CAN Change About Yourself that WILL Change Him

37 Comments

Silhouette of a woman and man watching the sunset over the ocean.
Change just this one thing, and watch it change everything!

You've tried everything up until now. And nothing seems to be working.

He's feeling pressured, so you back off. He's saying he's confused, so you try to help him sort through his confusion.

You give him more space – on the surface, but in your mind, there's no space between you. He's always on your mind. His last words are always on your heart. Never far away. Always ready to do something, to show him how much he should want to be with you. To try to convince him why the two of you could be the best thing ever.

But there's something you've missed here. It has nothing to do with him, but everything to do with you.Continue Reading

Does He Ever Commit?

60 Comments

A man sits leaning his head on his arm looking away, afraid of commitment.
Will he ever come around?

Does he ever get past this?

This not committing, but not ending things either.

This limbo.

This one foot in your world, and one foot in another. This leaving you hanging, without a crystal ball.

Will he? Or Won’t he?

And what we most want to know; is it worth waiting it out?Continue Reading

Was My Impulsive Emotional "Good Bye" Text The Reason It Ended?

30 Comments

A beautiful woman sits in a window looking at her phone wondering if her text ended the relationship.
I don't expect to hear from him again and know I have to move on.

One of our many beautiful friends, who has chosen to remain anonymous (she has signed her letter "So Regretful"), is wondering if the emotional text that she sent to him caused their relationship to end.

Here's her story:

Dear Jane,

Someone I knew contacted me out of the blue after 20 years.

We were only friends then, never dated. He said he never stopped thinking about me and although he has a girlfriend  he said he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. I had always thought about him as well.

Right off the bat he asked me to be patient with him so he could get things sorted out. He kept calling and texting me all the time. After 8 months of asking when I would be able to see him, I pushed the point and we finally met for lunch. It was great and the mutual attraction was definitely there.

We talked about being together in the future, our likes, dislikes, etc..

The holidays came and went and his texts became more infrequent and the calls stopped. He apologized and said he had so much going on but that his feelings had not changed. We continued to text but no calls.Continue Reading

Getting Over "The One"

52 Comments

A beautiful woman is frazzled because she can't seem to get over a breakup.
It's been FOUR months and I still cry about him almost daily.

One of our beautiful readers, Kat, was in a wonderful long term relationship with a great guy, only to have it all fall apart as soon as she told him she was ready to take things to the next level - sound familiar?

Here's her story:

Hi Jane,

I am a big fan of your website and read your posts regularly. I am trying to follow your advice and move on from a man I thought was "the one", but I am having a very hard time.

We were introduced by a mutual friend. Initially I thought he was nice, but I wasn't really interested.

I went out on a couple dates with him and didn't feel much of a spark.Continue Reading

I Just Want It To Be the Way It Was

67 Comments

A beautiful woman looks in a mirror wanting it to be the way it was.
I put myself out there everyday, only to feel rejected afterwards.

One of our beautiful, sweet readers, who has asked to remain anonymous, has been in a long distance relationship with her boyfriend of a year and a half, and has gone through quite a roller-coaster of difficulties, including cheating.

I've chosen to call her Plumeria, after the beautiful and fragrant flowers that are used to make Hawaiian leis.

Here's her email:

Jane,

My relationship with my boyfriend has been going on for about a year and a half.

We started dating after I got out of a two year relationship the same time that he did, and we kind of gave each other moral support.  He was always someone I was attracted to, and I had admired his relationship, and I think I was the same for him.Continue Reading

What Should I Do? He Says He Wants to Slow Things Down

90 Comments

A woman is holding her head, exasperated, wondering why he wants to slow things down.
Things were going so well, but now he wants to slow things down!

One of our beautiful readers, who has asked to remain anonymous, is in a new relationship where the sparks were flying. After they were intimate, he has said that he wants to slow things down, and now she doesn't know what to do.

I've chosen to call her "Daisy", because she reminds me of all the beautiful spring flowers blooming right now, finding out just how beautiful – and how worthy – they truly are.

Naturally. In their own time.

Here's her email:

Hello,

I am very confused and don't know what to do.

I met someone and we hit it off right away. We talk on the phone every day, go to dinner when we get the chance (we live far from each other so don't get to go on dates as much as we would like) and have a strong connection.

After about a month he invited me over his home to spend the night. He told me he wants to be with me and that he really likes me.

We ended up sleeping together.Continue Reading

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