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Is He Interested or Not?

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A woman looks at her phone wondering if he's still interested.
Is he really interested, or am I just bugging him?

Our beautiful friend, Dani, has been texting a man for six weeks on Tinder, but now he's pulling away. She's wondering what's going on.

Here's her email:

I met a guy on Tinder. We have been texting for about 6 weeks.

We had plans to meet twice but he couldn't make it either time...once he said his daughter's mother's family had a family emergency and he had to get his daughter. The second time he said he lost his phone and couldn't contact me.

Recently, he never initiates conversations.

He says he's been sick. I feel like I am bugging him but he told me he doesn't mean to make me feel unwanted by him. I already asked him not to waste our time...if he's not interested, just tell me.

Can you help me understand what he's doing?Continue Reading

The Truth Underneath

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The word truth in a dictionary being highlighted with a red highlighter.
Don't be afraid of the truth. Ever.

I used to be so afraid of the truth coming out.

The truth about whether he was really into me, the truth about who he really was, the truth about whether he was ready for a commitment and especially the truth about whether he would ever want to marry me and have children.

I’d always just assume we were on the same page because after all, we were having so much fun, and it was so much easier to keep enjoying what we had rather than ruin everything with reality checks.

So much easier to keep on going then rocking the boat with things that would surely work themselves out in the long run if we were meant to be.Continue Reading

Help! I'm Only Attracted to Emotionally Unavailable Men

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Electric cable with sparks on black background.
I only feel "the spark" with the rascals!

This week our letter comes all the way from Sweden! Our beautiful friend, Micka, has been chasing emotionally unavailable men most of her life, and she's now realizing that she wants to stop going down that path. The problem is that the "nice" guys are not attractive to her.

Here's what she wrote:

Hello Jane. My name is Micka and I am a woman living in Sweden.

I am 56 years of age, probably far older than most of your readers. For the last 17 years, I have been single since divorcing a man after 10 years. I've had some romantic encounters but I do have the same problem as many other women here, I keep falling for emotionally unavailable men.

I know all the reasons why I am drawn to these men and why these complicated relationships makes me rise to the occasion, always ending up in pain and tears. I do believe I had my last relationship of that kind some months ago - last, because it almost killed me and I have sworn to not go there again.Continue Reading

For Better or Worse

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Jane Garapick wedding photo on the beach.
There's the perfect wedding photo. Then there's the reality.

It was our anniversary last week. We’ve been married 14 years now.

When I posted a picture of my wedding day to Facebook, I was so grateful for the wonderful responses I got from so many of you, but I felt like there was something missing.

I felt like that picture said so little and for you, for every one of you who I’ve gotten to know so well here in our Internet community, I was left feeling like there was so much more I wanted to say.

To anyone who doesn’t know me, it was just another picture of one more happy couple who met and found the kind of love we all long for. It looks perfect.

The perfect couple on their wedding day. The perfect location. The perfect everything.

And yes, that day was just about as close to perfect as a day has ever been for me.

But there’s something else I need to tell you. Another part of this you won’t usually hear; the part you can't see in the picture.Continue Reading

I Always Seem To Attract The Wrong Guy

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A beautiful woman is consoled by her dog after a breakup.
I always manage to fall for the wrong guy - help!

How do you stop attracting the wrong guys? One of our beautiful readers, Nicky, is having this problem that so many of us (myself included!) have struggled with at one time or another.

Here's her email:

Hi Jane

I don't know where I'm going wrong but I always manage to fall for the wrong guy - help!

I started off in my late teens by falling for guys who either lied or emotionally black mailed me and after learning my lessons on that one I now attract guys who can't commit.

My last relationship of 3 years strung me along believing he wanted marriage and children like me but then when it came to committing to that he then just selfishly dropped me and said that wasn't what he wanted.Continue Reading

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