Getting to TRUE Love

Finding your YOU that leads to TWO

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Finding Love

The posts in the Finding Love category relate to bringing love into your life, whether you are currently single, dating, or in a relationship. This category includes topics such as finding yourself, knowing what you want, living your life, etc.

Remember This One Thing...

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A snowflake covered clock counting down to 2020
This is how you shine, Beautiful.

Wherever the old year finds you tonight, wherever the new year finds you tomorrow, promise me you'll remember one thing.

You have nothing to prove.

NOTHING.

Not to anyone, and especially not to the ones you think you do.

The ones who want you will want you.

The ones who like you will like you.

And the ones who love you will absolutely love you - just the way you are!

Your work is only to learn how to tell the difference so that you never, EVER have to go through any more heartbreak like you've already been through. Because it's been enough already.

We're not talking about a few minor tweaks, we're talking about the essence of you!

Never forget that part, Beautiful.Continue Reading

I Was Beautiful for 3 Months

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Beautiful woman looking into a mirror.
I've said those exact same words myself.

It was just a comment that came into my inbox, but it was these words that caught my attention enough to know there was something more that needed to be said.

Why?

Because I've said those exact same words myself and I know so many of you have, too.

How many of us have felt these same words? When we're loved, we're beautiful. When we're no longer loved, we're no longer beautiful.

Isn't that what we feel?

There's no shortage of messages we receive that tell us we're beautiful when we're loved. There's no shortage of confirmation of those words from even our well-meaning friends and family who comment on how radiant we look when we're basking in someone's love.

We get the message.Continue Reading

The Reason You Still Can't Believe It's Not You

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A beautiful woman looks down, sad, wondering if her boyfriend is getting distant.
Why do we do this?

I've been having some deep discussions on my calls lately, around the underlying subject of our longings for unconditional love.

Leftover from our childhoods, from a place most of us have never connected to the present, until we realize something must be amiss for us to keep attracting and choosing the men that we do. The irony is that while we long for unconditional love with every part of our heart and soul, we look for it precisely from the ones completely incapable of giving us that kind of love.

Why do we do this?

It makes no sense to our logical minds, but the pull is so strong (and entirely subconscious) to extract this kind of love from someone who cannot give it to us because he never received enough of any kind of love to have a place of overflow within himself that it could even come from.

Why the pull? It's because it's so familiar.

It's once again someone with so much potential because they give us glimpses of that soft part within them. We take that and run with it because even just the feeling of the possiblity of that potential lights us up to the possibility of what might be. This time might be different. This time. The promise of which is so familiar. Continue Reading

Pick One Thing

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A beautiful woman walks down a path, representing different choices in her relationships.
There are so many different roads to the same place.

Anyone need a little hope today?

Because there's no feeling of hope when you're in the thick of it. Not when it feels like nothing is ever going to get better because you can't get past every little mistake you made, every wrong path, every choice you should have made so differently.

That's the only thing that's clear when you're here.

Every choice you made that you regret making because of where it led, every "mistake" you think you made, every thing you ever did that gave you a different outcome than the one you wanted that path to lead to, makes it's so hard to believe that it's BECAUSE of those things that you're going to get to a different place that's actually the place you want to be!

But that's exactly my point.

See, there are so many different roads to the same place. Pick one, any one.

Pick the one that makes the most sense to you right now. Or pick the one that your heart tells you to right now.Continue Reading

Sure, it may be simple. But don't ever call it easy!

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A beautiful woman sits on a park bench wondering why she loves him.
And don't make it more difficult than it already is.

I've been talking a lot recently about the difference between something being easy and something being simple.

Like relationships.

And love.

And choosing something different than you're used to choosing.

Some of you get so down on yourselves because you get this in theory, but then you can't seem to apply it to your practical reality. You may have friends or family who make you feel like there's something wrong with you because it's not happening the way they make it seem like it should be, but the truth is, there's a world of difference between easy and simple.Continue Reading

The Mindset that Changes Everything

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A beautiful woman is stretching and smiling because of her new love mindset
What a difference a simple mindset change can make!

You know all those things you don't do? All those opportunities you don't take? All those times your fear of saying the wrong thing or coming across as too forward, too desperate or too needy hold you back from saying anything at all?

There's a reason we don't act. There's a reason we don't take our chances. There's a reason our fears around coming across in a less than perfect way keeps us from saying or doing anything at all.

I had a call this week with a woman who needed help figuring out how to find out if a guy she's been on a few dates with is for real, or not.

She discovered he may have some questionable history and yet he's not acting like he's got anything to hide. She's so conflicted about what to say and how to say it, she's not sure if she even wants to go out with him again. But she needs more information before she makes any decision.Continue Reading

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