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Help! I'm Only Attracted to Emotionally Unavailable Men

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Electric cable with sparks on black background.
I only feel "the spark" with the rascals!

This week our letter comes all the way from Sweden! Our beautiful friend, Micka, has been chasing emotionally unavailable men most of her life, and she's now realizing that she wants to stop going down that path. The problem is that the "nice" guys are not attractive to her.

Here's what she wrote:

Hello Jane. My name is Micka and I am a woman living in Sweden.

I am 56 years of age, probably far older than most of your readers. For the last 17 years, I have been single since divorcing a man after 10 years. I've had some romantic encounters but I do have the same problem as many other women here, I keep falling for emotionally unavailable men.

I know all the reasons why I am drawn to these men and why these complicated relationships makes me rise to the occasion, always ending up in pain and tears. I do believe I had my last relationship of that kind some months ago - last, because it almost killed me and I have sworn to not go there again.Continue Reading

For Better or Worse

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Jane Garapick wedding photo on the beach.
There's the perfect wedding photo. Then there's the reality.

It was our anniversary last week. We’ve been married 14 years now.

When I posted a picture of my wedding day to Facebook, I was so grateful for the wonderful responses I got from so many of you, but I felt like there was something missing.

I felt like that picture said so little and for you, for every one of you who I’ve gotten to know so well here in our Internet community, I was left feeling like there was so much more I wanted to say.

To anyone who doesn’t know me, it was just another picture of one more happy couple who met and found the kind of love we all long for. It looks perfect.

The perfect couple on their wedding day. The perfect location. The perfect everything.

And yes, that day was just about as close to perfect as a day has ever been for me.

But there’s something else I need to tell you. Another part of this you won’t usually hear; the part you can't see in the picture.Continue Reading

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