There is something he needs from you. More than anything else you might think he wants from you, if he could express in so many words what he needs, it would be these.
He needs you to recognize him for who he is, and not who you want him to be.
He needs you to accept him for who that is – the only person that he can be: himself.
He needs you to see him as his own person, and not someone you project on him.
He needs you to understand that he's not going to change.
He needs you to know he can't always be what you want him to be.
He needs you to know he can't live up to anyone else's potential for him. He can only live within his own.
He needs you to remember that there will always be a little boy inside him, apart from whatever image he projects on the outside.
He needs to be loved for who he is, not for who you want him to be.
Then, and only then, after you've accepted all of these things about him, he needs you to make your own decision, instead of looking to him.
If you can live with who he is, if you can accept his terms, if you can stop trying to change him, if you can stop trying to control him and simply allow him to be, then this is where you meet him. It can't be up to him.
It has to be up to you.
You have to choose him. He knows if you're faking it, if you can't do it, if you're only fooling yourself that you can.
He senses your truth.
He picks up on it. Because it's all in your energy. Your unspoken words. How can he not? No matter how much you try to convince yourself otherwise, you know it too!
You know you can never be happy settling for someone who's not on your page. You know you have so much love in your heart, you could never EVER be content receiving so little in return. But if you don't know this, if you don't know for sure where you stand, that's the part he most needs you to figure out.
Are you in?
Or are you only pretending to be?
He can tell the difference, even if you can't. He can't feel good about you – and your relationship – if you're only pretending this is working for you.
He needs you to stand up on your own beautiful two feet and tell him what you can live with – and what you can't. It doesn't matter if you can't say it, or don't want to. He already knows it by how you are.
You say you want him. You say you love him. But wanting someone and loving someone means wanting and loving him. If it's only his potential and not him, if it's only the side he shows you sometimes and not all of him, he sees right through this and needs you to be honest with yourself- and him.
If you don't value yourself enough to find this out, he won't either.
If you don't consider yourself worthy enough a prize to hold out for what you actually want, he won't either.
If you don't show him with your words and actions that you mean what you say and won't accept anything less, he won't know what to believe.
Don't ever doubt that you don't have a say in all of this; oh how you do!
Show up, find out, get clear yourself. It's what he needs most from you.