emotionally distant

I'm Desperate! My Partner Has Distanced Himself From Me and I Don't Know What to Do

A beautiful woman with her face in her hands because her self esteem is so low. — I miss how we used to be.

Our letter this week comes from a reader who calls herself "Hopelessly in Love" (I'll call her "Hil".)

Sound familiar? I know most of us can relate to that feeling at some point or another and it's usually right up until we learn how to recognize the difference between something "hopeless" and something real.

Here's her story.

Hi Jane,

I need help. I'm desperate!

I met my partner online, we hit it off and exchanged phone numbers, we texted every waking day/night for hours and hours, even facetimed every day/night.

Recently I've noticed that my partner has changed completely, almost like a 360 turn around.Continue Reading

Confused and Upset and Just Want My Boyfriend Back. But is it me?

Here's her letter and what I had to say...

Hi Jane,

I’ve been with my boyfriend for 6 months. The first four months were fantastic. We saw each other whenever we could (both have jobs and children), messaged constantly all day and talked about the future.

A couple of months ago he started to become more distant, taking longer to reply, not instigating meeting up so much etc.Continue Reading

Are you with someone who isn't really there?

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Woman sitting by a lake feeling all alone in her relationship. — Where is he?

Look around you.

Where is he?

Is he there?

Is he reaching out to you? Is he showing you he's worth all the time and energy you're spending thinking about him, wondering about him, going back over and over what you should have done instead?

No, he's not there.

He's not anywhere that you know for sure. Only in your mind. Only when you bring him up, when you remind yourself of everything he was, everything he seemed to be in what seems like such a different time and place.Continue Reading

Help! I've Tried Talking to Him but He Still Does the Same Thing

Here's what she wrote ...

I have been with this guy for quite some time. At first, we would meet up as often as possible - like twice in a week - but now not so often because we are both busy and I only get to see him once every two weeks.

The major concern is that he never communicates even if it's a good morning or calling in the evening to know how my day was. It seems like a task for him. He rarely initiates conversations unless I do or tells me he loves me unless I do.

He would go for days without texting me or even calling even if it's for a few minutes just checking up on me unless I do myself. Yet when he does,after days several days, he acts like we are okay.

At times he leaves me on read on whatsapp and yet he is online on several occasions.

I have tried talking to him about my concerns and he still does the same thing.Continue Reading

Suddenly No Response!

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A beautiful woman is sitting On Couch At Home anxiously looking at her phone wondering why he hasn't responded. — I can't believe I'm feeling so bad about this.

It was Julia's letter that showed up in my inbox the other day, and like so many of you, she found reassurance in knowing she wasn't alone in dealing with her current heartbreak; dealing with a guy who once was at first so responsive, now not responding at all.

Here's her story.

Hi Jane,

I came across this website so thought I'd try to find some reassurance here.

I've been divorced for a short time after a long marriage. I reunited with an old boyfriend I hadn't seen since my early twenties. We got along so well, like we'd been together for years.

I've always believed that we were made for each other.

He lives interstate but we kept in touch; he's also divorced and was making plans to come see me.Continue Reading

He Says He Wants Space - Is There Any Hope?

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A beautiful woman is looking at her boyfriend with love wondering is he losing interest. — Is there any chance for us to be together again?

This week our beautiful friend Jo finds herself falling apart after her boyfriend of one year told her he wants some "space". She's wondering if there's any hope left at all.

Here's her letter:

Hi Jane,

My story is not really complicated, but it might be different than usual.

I moved to States from Europe around mid-September last year.

I was bored, didn’t have friends yet, so I went out on a date with guy met online. To be honest first date was not great. He had too much wine and started touching me which I don’t like on a first date with the guy that I just met. I was even so stupid that I let him take me home. We kissed, but I didn’t like it.

But that's how I actually met my boyfriend.

I gave him a second chance after first date, we spoke about what we want, he apologized more than once.Continue Reading

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I'm Desperate! My Partner Has Distanced Himself From Me and I Don't Know What to Do

Here's her story.

Confused and Upset and Just Want My Boyfriend Back. But is it me?

Here's her letter and what I had to say...

Are you with someone who isn't really there?

Help! I've Tried Talking to Him but He Still Does the Same Thing

Here's what she wrote ...

Suddenly No Response!

Here's her story.

He Says He Wants Space - Is There Any Hope?

Here's her letter:

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