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You are here: Home / Archives for broken heart

I keep getting dumped - every year

2 Comments

Silhouette of sad woman looking at sunset over water, shame concept
They always say the same thing...

Our letter this week is from Hope, who wrote to me about her pattern of getting dumped every year. She gets the same reasons every time and is beginning to wonder if she's just unlovable even though she's still so young. She doesn't feel that way.

Did you ever feel that way? This is so familiar to me, it was like looking in a mirror as I read her words. I hope you find my response to be helpful to you as well. Here's what she had to say.

Her Story:

I am 24. I know this is young, but almost every year since I was 17 I have been dumped for exactly the same reasons "the spark is gone", "just don't love you anymore", "just not feeling it anymore".

It's becoming embarrassing to tell my friends that I have been dumped yet again especially when so many of them have been in long term relationships.

I always ask them why and they always say the same thing "you haven't done anything", "you're amazing", "it's me, not you", "I promise you have done nothing".Continue Reading

Do you think there's any way I could get him back?

7 Comments

Beautiful woman sitting on the beach, sad because of her breakup, wants to get her boyfriend back.
He was the best boyfriend I've ever had.

That was Kate's question for me. And my answer to her is the same to you if you've ever asked this yourself.

Her Story:

Hi Jane,

I met my boyfriend online, and at first I wanted to be just friends and he wanted to be more than friends. Later I changed my mind and decided to go out with him.

We dated for about 1-1/2 months and he broke it off yesterday saying he didn't have romantic feelings for me and that he thought of me as a friend. I'm so shocked and heartbroken because I really really liked him and thought we'd be together for a while.

We don't have much in common and we don't really know each other so I thought maybe that might be the problem. I want to be friends with him but I really want to get back together with him.

He was the best boyfriend I have ever had and he's a really good guy.Continue Reading

I Feel Like I'm Incapable of a Successful Relationship

5 Comments

Outdoor portrait of a sad woman feeling rejected.
I feel so down, so lonely and used.

The subject line of her email said it all. "I am incapable of a successful relationship."

I'm answering Tina's email on the blog today because I hear from so many of you who've come to the same conclusion and you've all but given up any hope of changing this. You're in the right place because I find hope out of hopelessness despite what you can't yet see, so stay with me here. If you've ever felt like this, I've got so much hope for you today!

Her Story:

Hi Jane,Continue Reading

How do I stop loving him and move on?

21 Comments

Rear view pensive thoughtful woman sitting on sofa alone, lost in thoughts, upset female having psychological problem, heartbreak, thinking about being alone
I want to forget about him and move on with my life.

Our letter this week comes from beautiful Michelle who's heartbroken over a man who's seeing someone else. She knows he doesn't deserve her, but she's having a hard time letting him go. Sound familiar?

Her Story:

Hi Jane,

I'm hoping you can help me. I've been in a 5 year relationship with a man I'm in love with who so clearly doesn't love me.

We were seeing each other regularly until about a month ago when I found out he's been seeing someone else. I'm heartbroken. We haven't talked since then.Continue Reading

Duped by an avoidant guy. Is it fear that drove him away?

8 Comments

Sad woman hugging her emotionally unavailable boyfriend and looking down.
Was fear the driver of all of this?

Ever wondered why you keep attracting men with an avoidant-attachment style? Anne shared her story about someone just like this. Read on to hear what happened and my thoughts on why.

Her Story:

Hi Jane ...I just bought your book after another failed almost-relationship. It was so helpful, thank you. I wanted to explain my story; sorry that it’s long.

I work in a helping profession and am patient and all about feelings; I'm like so many of the women in this community.Continue Reading

Don't accept this!

39 Comments

A beautiful woman is holding her head in her hands wondering if her boyfriend who has commitment issues is just playing games or if he wants a committed relationship.
I feel like I wasn't good enough.

I'm speaking to every one of you today who's ever been left by some guy who was NEVER good enough for you.

Stop with the "I wasn't good enough", "He's thrown me away", and everything else we say.

No, you haven't been discarded, girl. Don't accept that as your verdict!

You were saved from being with someone who would NEVER have been the one for you unless you were someone else. So choose to either change to be that someone else - or embrace who you already are and accept that you can't make someone want to be with you who isn't looking for you!

This isn't a "prove your worth" game with all the wrong ones; it's a "find someone who's actually compatible with you because he's looking for someone just like you" reality.

Not a game, not a challenge, not a distraction from doing your own work. It's a beautiful life if you choose to stop looking at it in these old no-longer-serving-you ways!

Okay?

Love,

Jane

Tell me you got this message loud and clear in the comments, girl. I see you. I've felt your pain. And no, he still doesn't get to discard you. You were saved for something far better than him!

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About Jane Garapick

Hi, I'm Jane Garapick. I'm here to provide inspiration, support and empowerment on the journey to true love. I know what it’s like to have a broken heart, a broken dream, and a broken you. And I know for a fact, that your dreams can still come true! Read more...
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