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You are here: Home / 2019 / Archives for December 2019

Archives for December 2019

The Problem with "Broken"

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Woman looking into a broken mirror representing her low self-esteem.
It does more damage than all our other programming combined.

There's a single word for what we've been told about ourselves that does more damage than all our other programming combined.

Amongst all the stories we've been told about who we are, where we've come from, and why we can never trust ourselves more than we can trust someone else who always knows better than we do, it's the story that tells us we're broken, that we've always been broken and we need someone or something outside of us to save us from ourselves.

Sound familiar?

The problem is that when we've accepted this as our own story for so long, we stop questioning it. And even worse, we forget we even have the right to. And we don't even see that there is a problem.

See, when you've been told you're broken, when you've been told you have to go to some being outside yourself to ask for forgiveness for the simple act of being human, you're going to have a hard time believing you're not.Continue Reading

Vindicated

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Beautiful brunette woman thinking, tired, wondering if she's the one with commitment issues.
The woman in us who's been hurt a bazillion times feels vindicated.

See? You say. See?

That's why I can't find any good ones.

The woman in us who's been hurt a bazillion times feels vindicated.

See! It's just the way it is now.

But is it?

Look closer. No, not where you've always been looking, but somewhere different. Somewhere new.

Maybe that dominates, that being the current popular opinion that the new dating reality makes the act of swiping or putting a few syllables into a phone the most effort men have to make these days, but is that really the whole story?

Or is there more?

No, this isn't just the way it is for you! This is someone else's story. Stop making it your own. It's not!Continue Reading

The Reason You Still Can't Believe It's Not You

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A beautiful woman looks down, sad, wondering if her boyfriend is getting distant.
Why do we do this?

I've been having some deep discussions on my calls lately, around the underlying subject of our longings for unconditional love.

Leftover from our childhoods, from a place most of us have never connected to the present, until we realize something must be amiss for us to keep attracting and choosing the men that we do. The irony is that while we long for unconditional love with every part of our heart and soul, we look for it precisely from the ones completely incapable of giving us that kind of love.

Why do we do this?

It makes no sense to our logical minds, but the pull is so strong (and entirely subconscious) to extract this kind of love from someone who cannot give it to us because he never received enough of any kind of love to have a place of overflow within himself that it could even come from.

Why the pull? It's because it's so familiar.

It's once again someone with so much potential because they give us glimpses of that soft part within them. We take that and run with it because even just the feeling of the possiblity of that potential lights us up to the possibility of what might be. This time might be different. This time. The promise of which is so familiar. Continue Reading

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About Jane Garapick

Hi, I'm Jane Garapick. I'm here to provide inspiration, support and empowerment on the journey to true love. I know what it’s like to have a broken heart, a broken dream, and a broken you. And I know for a fact, that your dreams can still come true! Read more...
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