Finding your YOU that leads to TWO
Why would you want to stay with someone who doesn't want you?
Why would you insist you're getting something out of a relationship where you're getting nothing more than crumbs?
Why would you put yourself through this?
They don't understand. They can’t understand.
Because they’re not in it. You are. And when you're in it, there's nothing else to understand.
Except that you want him.
Except that you need him.
Except that you can't imagine your life without him.
We’re not meant to do this alone.
You’re not meant to.
And yet contrary to our inner knowing that knows this to be true, we try. Again and again, we try. We’ve put on ourselves that we can do this alone. That it’s a sign of strength, a show of our power, to make it on our own.
I fall into this trap, too.
I think I can do it on my own, that I don’t need anyone else. But the truth – the real truth, not the truth we want it to be – always comes out in the end.
We never should have met. She was a Junior, I was a Freshman. In a University that neither of us intended to attend.
She had envisioned a college in the woods. I had never in my wildest dreams imagined myself in an entirely different country, in Los Angeles, California.
But it was there that we met.Continue Reading
She slowly comes into view.
Happy. Content. Peaceful.
You’ve been through it all. And now you’re there. He’s there with you. The one you thought you missed.
You didn’t.
The one you thought you’d never find.
You did.
The one you never dared to believe could find you.
And of course he found you.
How could he not?
All those things you thought were taking you away from all chances of ever finding him. They’re how he found you!Continue Reading
Our beautiful friend, who has signed herself "Confusing Journey", has been on quite the journey indeed. She's wondering if he'll ever propose, or if this should really be the end. Read on for her story...
I have been with my boyfriend for 9 years. We met when we were 17 and 19.
We have had a great relationship, with some hiccups a long the way, him leaving, back together, me leaving... back together. The longest we ever separated for is 3 weeks though.
All of those issues occurred early in our relationship when we both were so young and we always worked through the issues. He is fun, but serious at the same time, a business major. His family says he has always been a 40 year old in a boy’s body. Lol.
He is confident and determined and is stable. I am outgoing and funny and care free. Kind of opposites, but I have seen his outgoing side and he has always been my rock.
Welllll, we were still not living together, but at our 7 year mark he decided that someone else had caught his attention and that he wanted to pursue this person.
He broke up with me and I was devastated to say the least, but in his defense he was completely up front and honest about it the whole time and 2 weeks went by of him in this limbo of does he want me, or does he want her.
Finally, I chose for him. I left for good.Continue Reading
What is it that keeps us putting up with things we never EVER in a million years imagined we'd be putting up with?
What has us turning a blind eye, not wanting to see the truth that's right there in front of us if we allow ourselves to see? What has us believing words when the actions – the proof – show us the real story?
What keeps us so in denial?
What keeps us constantly coming back for more?
What keeps us always looking at his potential instead of reality?
What keeps us continually going back and back again for more, in the hopes that this time it's going to finally be different?
Every single day my inbox fills up with your heartbreaking letters, detailing exactly how and why you gave like you did, why you overlooked everything you did, why you did everything you thought you're supposed to do when you've met someone who gives you so much of what you believe you're looking for.Continue Reading
I'm always struck by how much my clients and I have in common. Nowhere is this more evident than on the topic of unconditional love.
Ask any practical, logical person about it and they will have undoubtedly tell you that unconditional love is only something experienced by a parent towards a child. That it's not possible in any other relationship because it would require someone to be capable of loving someone else regardless of who they are or what they do or don't do.
And that, they would go on to say, isn't something we humans are truly capable of.
A religious or spiritual person would say that God - or what God represents to us - is the only one capable of truly loving us unconditionally. But for those of us who refuse to believe that unconditional love doesn't exist, no amount of logic or practical standpoints can quite shake the belief inside us that it does indeed exist.
But herein is my point: This is the precise reason why we're searching for it.Continue Reading
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