Getting to TRUE Love

Finding your YOU that leads to TWO

You are here: Home / Archives for good guys

I Think I Deserve More

22 Comments

Close up of womans hand using mobile phone on a bokeh background, symbolizing that her boyfriend doesn't text her.
A lot of his texts are the exact same ones that I send to him.

Ever wondered if you were wasting your time with someone? I hear you. And so does Kim. She wrote to me last week asking for my thoughts on her own situation. I'm sharing them here for her ... and you.

Her Story:

Hi Jane,

I have been divorced for 20 years and have dated and the longest relationship I had was 4 years.

My priority was always my daughter and since I had her 90% of the time, dating just didn’t fit into my life. I was enjoying my freedom when I did not have my daughter.

As she got older, I signed up for a dating site. Even though I still didn’t have time to date, it was nice getting the attention and companionship that I was missing. I met some nice men, but my feelings for most of the years were that I did not want an exclusive relationship.

I went on and off different dating sites because I got tired of the same games that were out there and I needed a break. But, would always get drawn back in to try again.Continue Reading

Vindicated

4 Comments

Beautiful brunette woman thinking, tired, wondering if she's the one with commitment issues.
The woman in us who's been hurt a bazillion times feels vindicated.

See? You say. See?

That's why I can't find any good ones.

The woman in us who's been hurt a bazillion times feels vindicated.

See! It's just the way it is now.

But is it?

Look closer. No, not where you've always been looking, but somewhere different. Somewhere new.

Maybe that dominates, that being the current popular opinion that the new dating reality makes the act of swiping or putting a few syllables into a phone the most effort men have to make these days, but is that really the whole story?

Or is there more?

No, this isn't just the way it is for you! This is someone else's story. Stop making it your own. It's not!Continue Reading

Is He Too Good for Me Because of My Baggage?

2 Comments

fashionable woman with lots of baggage in the middle of the street
I feel guilty bringing all of my baggage to a relationship.

Our letter today comes from one of our beautiful readers who's chosen to go by the name "LoveIs." Like most of us who have ever been attracted to someone because of their potential, LoveIs is reaching out today for some answers on the question of what to do when you're attracted more to someone's potential than what they're actually showing you they're capable of.

Sound familiar? Read on to find out what I have say on this very relevant question.

Dear Jane,

I love all of your content and the time you spend sharing your knowledge to the world really touches people. You're one of a kind. Would you share some of that knowledge with me today?

I tend to overlook men who are actually good for me and am attracted to men who aren't.

I'm talking about the emotionally unavailable, you chase him, mysterious, keeps you guessing, you wanna be the one to change him type. For some reason, this type of man I find comfort in which is in no way logical but alas, here we are.Continue Reading

He Might Be Right In Front of You

15 Comments

 

A beautiful woman is re-thinking a relationship with the nice guy.
Don't overlook that genuinely nice guy just because you don't think he's your type.

Sometimes the perfect guy for you has been right there all along, you just didn't notice.

Buried in between all the unhealthy relationships that never turned out the way I wanted them to; in between all those heartbreaking dramatic episodes with guys that could never give me what I was so looking for, there were a few men who were what I now recognize as really healthy, relationship material kind of guys.

But at the time I was just not open to seeing them that way; instead I continued to chase the unhealthy romantic fantasies about love that I had in my head.

These were genuinely good guys who were looking for an exclusive relationship, weren't afraid of commitment, were honest, were real and didn't play games.

Guys who would talk about real life everyday topics, would call when they said they were going to call, show up and plan ahead for when we would see each other so I felt confident that I was a priority, and basically treated me the way I actually wanted to be treated.

But because they weren't igniting my own unhealthy chemistry indicator, or maybe because they weren't going full tilt on the romantic pursuit that made me feel so desirable and worthy, they never stood a chance.Continue Reading

Latest Tweets

Recent Comments

Calendar

May 2025
M T W T F S S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031