You’re probably not even aware you’re doing it.
None of us do.
It happens so naturally, so subconsciously that it’s below our radar. And yet, it’s so ingrained in so many of us that we don’t even realize how detrimental it is to our beautiful selves and how much it affects our feelings of confidence and worth.
It doesn’t matter who it is we do this with, or what he has or doesn’t have; we’re the ones who feel the effects of this injustice.
It starts with the way he acts with us. It’s the way he maintains that distance with us that we put him on a pedestal simply because he knows he can choose and we feel like we can’t. He acts like he can take or leave us, and we only feel like we can be left. We all but forget that we’re the ones doing the choosing when all we can feel is the loneliness of our longing and the lack of anyone choosing us. It’s no wonder we give everyone else so much power and give ourselves away much too soon.
It’s because we don’t feel like equals.
When someone acts like they don’t really need anyone in their life, when they seem so confident in themselves and where they’re at we make them the superior ones and us the inferior. Since we feel the opposite. We walk into that same room looking for someone, hoping someone will choose us, lacking the self-confidence to know that we are all the same.
But we don’t feel that way.
You see, it’s because we don’t want to be alone, because we want to be part of a relationship, because we feel like we need someone in our life to make our lives complete. It’s because of these that when we walk into a room, when we go anywhere where there are other people, we know this about ourselves.
We do this to ourselves all the time.
And it’s not just about men. It affects so many areas of our lives.
We do this with our friends and acquaintances who all seem to make their relationships seem so easy by the ease with which they handle their ups and downs.
We do this at school with our teachers and later at our colleges and universities with our professors.
We do this with our co-workers and our supervisors at work when we attribute them with knowing so much more than we do simply because they've earned a higher degree or have a higher position.
Realizing this, is it any wonder we find ourselves questioning ourselves and our ability to offer anything of value, lacking the confidence to see that we have value just by being our beautiful true selves?
We need to see ourselves correctly.
Equals, my beautiful friend. That’s my challenge for you today, beginning right now. It’s time to stop seeing everyone as having so much more than you, of knowing so much more than you, of being worthy of so much more than you. You don’t know their story, you don’t know what they really feel underneath that apparently confident outer facade they project.
But this isn't about them, it’s about you. And what you have to offer.
The next time you walk into a room, the next time you’re around anyone, anywhere, anytime, it’s time to remember who you are. It doesn't matter who they are, what they've done or haven’t done, how confident they may seem, or how much they may seem to have it all together in the ways you wish you did. This isn't about them. It’s not about anyone else but you.
Hold your head up high. Smile that beautiful smile of yours. Let that beautiful true light of you radiate so that the real you can be seen for all that you are. Feel that confidence of knowing you are comfortable in your own beautiful skin.
There is no one you need to prove anything to. There is no one you need to measure up to. There is no one more deserving of anything – especially not love! – than you.
You don’t need anybody or anything. You desire someone who’s worthy of you and you refuse to accept anything less than that.
Feel that difference!
And walk on in. Or walk on by. And in that process take every single one of those people down from that pedestal you've placed them on.
Equals, my beautiful friend; that’s what you are with each and every one of them. No matter who they are, no matter what they've done, no matter what they can do that you don’t yet believe you can.
Always remember - you’re the prize!