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Your Worst Fear

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Rear view pensive thoughtful woman sitting on sofa alone, lost in thoughts, upset female having psychological problem, heartbreak, thinking about being alone
Here's why it's not going to happen.

We have to talk about your worst fear. I know you've got many, but this one stands out because it's the one that's hurting you the most.

There's too many of us here hanging onto a guy who's already missed all your checkboxes only because you're afraid you'll never meet anyone else as good as him.

This is the absolute worst reason to put up with what you're putting up with right now!

See, there aren't all these people walking around on this planet right now and no one who could possibly be someone for you.

This is one of the biggest lies we've ever been programmed with; that you have to ignore how badly someone is treating you, that you have to minimize and excuse away all those behaviors that you used to say you'd never tolerate, just to avoid being alone.

No, you're not going to be alone forever!Continue Reading

You Know When it Happens?

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A beautiful woman is feeling lonely and sad, feeling as though nothing will ever change.
It's so hard to believe anything could possibly be any different.

You know when it happens for you, Beautiful? The moment right after you think it won't.

The very next moment after you think all hope is lost, that nothing's ever going to change for you, that you're simply destined to be alone forever, that you're simply one of the unlucky ones and that's never going to change.

That's when.

We think we'll know when we're getting close. That we'll somehow hear that voice along the way that tells us it's right around the corner.

But, Beautiful, it doesn't happen like that. Right up to the moment right before you know for sure, you won't believe anything could possibly be any different.

Until it is.

I hear this all the time.Continue Reading

Vindicated

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Beautiful brunette woman thinking, tired, wondering if she's the one with commitment issues.
The woman in us who's been hurt a bazillion times feels vindicated.

See? You say. See?

That's why I can't find any good ones.

The woman in us who's been hurt a bazillion times feels vindicated.

See! It's just the way it is now.

But is it?

Look closer. No, not where you've always been looking, but somewhere different. Somewhere new.

Maybe that dominates, that being the current popular opinion that the new dating reality makes the act of swiping or putting a few syllables into a phone the most effort men have to make these days, but is that really the whole story?

Or is there more?

No, this isn't just the way it is for you! This is someone else's story. Stop making it your own. It's not!Continue Reading

Is It Too Late For Me?

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A beautiful woman with camera looking at a man.
It's the lens we see through that colors everything.

This week our question comes from one of our beautiful readers, Sheela, who is wondering if it's too late for her and if all the good men really are taken.

Here's her email:

Hi Jane

I really love your blog and I was hoping you could answer a question.

I'm 38 years old, and I've never had any kind of a serious relationship, simply because I went through so many traumatic incidents in childhood and suffered such severe school bullying that I was afraid of getting close to men.

I've never gone past a few dates with anyone.Continue Reading

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