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You are here: Home / Archives for what you’re attracting

No wonder you've lost all hope

4 Comments

A beautiful woman with her face in her hands because her self esteem is so low.
I had absorbed every ounce of that energy.

No one could convince me otherwise.

I had too much evidence to the contrary. All my past relationships, all the men I'd ever dated. They only showed me one thing - the same thing - nothing was ever changing, they all ended up the same, and the only thing I could count on with any certainty was that I was going to keep repeating the same patterns every time, no matter how I chose or where I moved to or what circumstances were different for me.

I was the problem.

I was the common-denominator. This could only be something about me. Everything I tried produced the same results, just a different guy with a different face and name, but the pattern, the intense chemistry and the promise of everything in the beginning followed by the gradual distancing and then the total demise of whatever was left of the relationship.

This was always the way it happened for me and NOTHING on the horizon seemed like it could move the needle one bit.

It didn't matter how I looked or what my actual age was or what I had going for me. I felt no different than if I was a 90 year old woman on her deathbed.

I had absorbed every ounce of that energy.Continue Reading

Why am I ALWAYS attracting struggling men?

17 Comments

Unhappy couple after fight not talking to each other
I keep attracting men who are struggling.

Have you ever been in a relationship where you lift a broken man up to where he's finally on his own two feet, only to have him leave you for another woman? If so, you can relate to beautiful Lolly who shared her heartbreak with us today.

Here's her story:

Hi Jane,

First of all I would like to say that I appreciate you and all that you do for us as women in your "small little community", being a part of Getting to True Love has brought such a tremendous change in my life, the women in this community are just as amazing, I feel like I have gained such an amazing sisterhood.

We might all be worlds apart but you have brought us together for one reason only - to find love, first within ourselves and secondly with the men out there. Thank you.

So my question today is I have noticed that I always attract men who are struggling, be it financially and emotionally, more especially financially, it's either they are still finding their way up or I meet them at the time when things are just not going well in their careers or when their businesses are not doing well.Continue Reading

Think you know the single biggest motivating force behind your relationships?

34 Comments

What is love words written on blackboard using chalk
What do you believe love really is?

I've got a question you'll want to answer right now, Beautiful.

It matters because it's at the root of all your relationships, whether it's conscious or not, and it's past time we get you to the bottom of this mystery of why you keep finding yourself in the relationships you do!

What was the first belief you held about love, whether you realized it or not?

Love conquers all?

Love is only for some select few?

Love is blind?

Love hurts?

I've been studying relationships and the question of why we choose who we do long enough to see a direct correlation between what we believe about love and who we find ourselves in relationships with, whether you even realize you hold these beliefs or not.Continue Reading

What No One Ever Told You About Attraction and Compatibility

7 Comments

Silhouette of a woman and a man about to kiss, symbolizing love.
Yes, attraction is very important, but...

I work with a lot of divorced women who are doing this the second time around. And there's a pattern I've noticed.

The guy they chose their first time around isn't the one they're choosing this time. What they learned about their first choice is influencing their second choice.

Whether this is your own first search or you're like them, doing this the second time around, I've got something invaluable to tell you to help you in your own search.

If you're a deep and sensitive person and choose the macho guys-guy kind of men, unless you've changed who you are, your next guy needs to be a deep and sensitive guy, too. These women have found that just because their original guy lit them up because he was so different from them and they were like, "Hey, what's it like to be you?!" doesn't mean they're actually compatible with this type of guy.Continue Reading

What the Mirror Means for You

49 Comments

Beautiful woman looking into a mirror.
THIS is why he has such a conflicted relationship with you.

You hold it up to see what it reveals.

You can't help it.

It's not just what you do. It's who you are.

You bring light to what never had light before.

You reveal what was always kept hidden before.

THIS is why he has such a conflicted relationship with you.

It's why he's half in and half 0ut.

It's why he gives you such mixed signals.

You're that good. That kind. That loving. That compassionate. That graceful.Continue Reading

Are you distracting yourself with THIS?

4 Comments

Closeup of a beautiful woman is looking sad becasue her boyfriend has disappeared on her and she wants closure.
You have to stop doing this to yourself.

If you've noticed there's a theme to my messages, my stories, and just about everything else I share with you, you're absolutely right.

It's the theme that says "There's nothing wrong with you; it's the wrong people in your life that's the problem!"

And while many of you push back on that because you've been so ingrained in taking personal responsibility for yourself and your actions to the point where you're the only one who's required to do that and everyone else gets off with an excuse, it's precisely by recognizing this theme as being true for you that you'll be able to take proper responsibility for yourself without the distraction of picking yourself apart like you've gotten so used to doing in the search for your answers!Continue Reading

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About Jane Garapick

Hi, I'm Jane Garapick. I'm here to provide inspiration, support and empowerment on the journey to true love. I know what it’s like to have a broken heart, a broken dream, and a broken you. And I know for a fact, that your dreams can still come true! Read more...
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