He's one guy.
I get that.
One really important guy you've pinned all your hopes and dreams on.
I get that, too.
But because one person isn't capable of seeing you, you're going to let that one person define your worth?
No! Not this time and not any other time either.
We're done doing that. We've done that too many times already.
Take him down off that pedestal right now, girl, and take a look at what you've actually got.
The real picture, not the fantasy of "but you don't know him like I do" that you keep coming back to. I DO know him like you do because guys like him are the ONLY ones I'd ever known before I finally did something about it and they all follow a familiar pattern.
Someone who breaks your heart over and over again.
Someone who triggers every one of your blind spots so you can't even see why it's happening. (Get my program WHY MEN PULL AWAY if you want to finally understand why.)
Sure, those good times feel great. Sure, he's got a ton of potential. But there's more to life than potential that breaks your heart every single day, more to life than tears and loneliness and waiting for something to change.
Whatever happened to the woman you used to be who would NEVER allow herself to be treated this way?
Love,
Jane
Whatever happened to her? We all have our stories, our reasons why we've settled for the things that we do. Share yours here in the comments so we can make her more than just a memory again. I want to bring you back to the woman you used to be who stands in her power and NEVER allows herself to be treated this way!
He pulled away, way away he broke it off with me and rubbing it in my face. He is acting like he is sooooo happy that we are not together anymore. Wow was I that terrible. I’m now seeing that it was all about him, we always did what he wanted, went where he wanted to go, ate what he want d to eat, listened to the music he wanted etc. What was I thinking? I feel like he may have been a narcissist. He was always concerned about his looks, it seemed like the way he looked was more important then the way I looked when we were going out. He was very domineering and hungry for attention. Selfish! Last but not least he always complained about my kids and he wanted them to do all the cleaning and cooking in the house, knowing my kiddos that was never going to happen, I felt like he wanted them to be his slave! I think I stayed because I felt like I needed him and I was vulnerable. I never want to be in that situation again. I’m working on myself and becoming a better me!
No, you weren't that terrible, Susana. It's precisely because you were that wonderful that all that selfishness came out! He did for you what you needed to do for yourself. Run as far away from him as you possibly could. He just did that for you! Now here's to you being more of all of you and not what someone like this would want you to be!
Jane your beautiful heart, thank you for that. Yes where is that beautiful women beautiful little girl, that seized the day and thrive for life, my life.
I am here so thankful for you program, heart and yes you.
Not always loving the journey, yet being uncomfortable I know is growth.
Thank you for the encouragement the support and gentle yet truth you offer along the way.
Beautiful Confident Radiant You
Amazing 💗
I'm so glad you saw yourself here, Andrea. I see so much of you, too. You make this possible, girl. You're the one who brings all the hope and potential - real potential - of a life worth so much more than you can even imagine if you want it. It's always up to you. And right where you are, doing what you're doing right now, is always enough, too. Much love to you tonight. The stars are shining down on you!
It's hard to explain it all here, but we were messaging each other then he went silent. Two months later, just yesterday he messaged me out of the blue! I couldn't believe it! He wanted to chat. So we did. He refused to admit he had ghosted me. He said he didn't mean any disrespect, that I could trust him. I said I wasn't sure if I could straight away. This morning, without warning, he blocked me and I have no way of contacting him now. I love him very deeply, but he keeps building me up and tearing me down. It's torture. It hurts and I don't know how to stop the pain. What can I do. I'm dying.
Don't trust him again, Michelle. When someone says you can trust them, that's a warning sign to me. The good ones show you they can be trusted, with more than just the words. Every time you let him back in, you open up the raw wounds of not just him, but someone leaving you, abandoning you, and the torture begins all over again. Make a list of all the things you love about someone who can do this to you. Why him? Who does he represent? Learn to see him in practical, logical terms of someone who behaves this way in real life, not the magical feeling of being claimed again when he comes back on a whim. There's an emotional attachment you have to him and until you've dealt with that, he's going to have this hold over you. It's not actually him; it's what and who he represents. Figure out that piece and it'll be easier to see him for who he is instead of who you so want - and believe he has the potential to be!
If you could send me your E Book
I have been on and off with my partner for 14 years .
He helps me , he has supported me with money in the past and
fixed things for me and stand by me in hospital
we still have time in bed and we have been getting extremely close in the last 2 months and i want to get deeper into this relationship but he says he is not ready and this has been the case for years
If you subscribe, you'll get it automatically sent to you, Tanya. As for your partner, I know it's so hard to see it when you've got 14 years invested in someone. That's a long time! And it keeps you feeling like you've already invested so much, why not stay a little longer just to see, just in case?! But he's showing you for years then that this is as far as he's willing to go with you. You've got a choice now. Either accept him for who he's telling/showing you he is and what he's capable of giving you and be with him as he is, or don't accept him because you want something different. You're not going to change him, he's shown you that by this being the case for years. So focus on whether you can accept who he is right in front of you, as is. If you can't, you've got your answer. As hard as it is to accept.