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How do I make him see I'm his one and only?

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Beautiful brunette woman thinking, tired, wondering if she's the one with commitment issues.
I put so much into this relationship, but I don't want to pressure him.

Ever noticed that the men who complain the most about drama in their relationships are the ones who bring it on themselves and project it onto you?

This fits Cami's story perfectly. Read on as she shares her story, looking for some advice on what to do.

Her Story:

Hi Jane,

My boyfriend and I have been together just over 2 years. We have had a little on and off again stuff. We are from the same small community and so his ex wife and I are familiar with each other (she was my teenage son and daughter’s 4th grade teacher and I played softball with her in the summers growing up).Continue Reading

Doors

33 Comments

Many home white door open in cloudy sky
Open the one that's right for you.

I've been talking about this a lot on my calls lately.

That's right. Doors.

Like that door you keep trying so hard to open?

You know, the one you keep pounding on that STILL won't open, no matter what you do.

Well, what's behind it isn't yours!

Go knock on another door. And another. Don't keep wasting your time.

If it's not opening, it's not a sign to try harder, to be more, to do more, to make it the mountain you choose to die on out of principle.

It's not meant to be!

The one that opens? Fling it open with arms wide open, Girl.

THAT'S the one for you! ❤️

Love,

Jane

I know someone needed this today. Let me know in the comments if it was you!

She never thought she'd find love, but this past weekend ...

8 Comments

A man and woman on their wedding day.
I’m so happy for her. And her ex, too.

An old acquaintance of mine got married last weekend. I saw her pictures on Facebook and found myself crying right along with her tears in her pictures.

I knew what it must have meant to her.

I knew her well about 5 years ago. My neighbor at the time was her boyfriend, and she lived with him - they were the cutest couple. Now of course he’s her ex – and has been for awhile, but I’ll get to that part in a minute.Continue Reading

He Cheated on Me, Now He Says I Need to Let the Past Go and Trust Him

22 Comments

The word trust spelled out in letter cubes.
He says I have trust issues or insecurities.

Holly's writing in today for some advice on what she should do about a guy she can't trust. He keeps trying to tell her it's her insecurities and inability to trust him that are the problem, not anything about his own behavior.

I don't think she's alone in this scenario and I have a feeling you're going to have a lot to say to her, as I did here.

Her story:

Hi Jane,

So my boyfriend and I have dated for over 2 1/2 years in total. It’s been an interesting relationship to say the least. He is a mechanic and used to work for my dad so I knew him since I was like 15 years old. He is 8 years old than I am.Continue Reading

The One Type of Man You ABSOLUTELY Can't Be With if You're Codependent

37 Comments

Woman and man sitting on a curb breaking up, man with his head in his hands
This is NOT your guy!

There's someone who keeps appearing in my calls with you.

A certain type of man that keeps coming up in our conversations, no matter where in the world you happen to be, regardless of your story, regardless if you've learned all those hard lessons, regardless of who you are and where you've been.

Years ago, I thought it was just me, and then just me and my friends, and then just some of the women I coached, and then almost every woman from every part of the world was telling me her story of the same type of man.

Until I realized, this was no coincidence.

All of us nurturers, grace-givers, empathetic feelers and sensitive souls can't help but feel the pull of this strong on the outside, yet soft on the inside kind of man.

We're the peace-makers, the harmonizers, the sympathizers, the empathizers, the understanding ones with a cup that seems to always be full for everyone else even as we become more and more depleted giving every part of ourselves following some unwritten "rules" about how we do relationships. And it's not just our relationships with men, it's our relationships with everyone!Continue Reading

10 Years Wasted on a Selfish Guy

24 Comments

Profile of a beautiful woman wondering if her guy will ever want a committed relationship.
He has hurt me so deeply. It's changed my view of men.

You know how you stay 'just a little longer' to see if he's going to change? And then you're afraid not to stay in case you miss that change?

That's the familiar scenario I'm talking about here. This is what happens when we wait it out, not realizing the time that passes in the meantime and the days that turn to months and then years.

This is why she wrote to me with the title, subject 'It's been 10 years'. If you've been here you know how it happens and how 'I'll just see how it goes' turns into 10 long years.Continue Reading

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